Vampire Knight: Realizations
by rheanette16
Summary: A comedy fanfic! The chapters rather contain what characters wouldn't normally do in the manga. I'm not really good at making parodies, but please bear with me! Thanks! Contains M/F and M/M pairings. Some chapters may contain spoilers.
1. Does Cross Academy have Computers?

**Vampire Knight: Realizations**

**Author's Notes:**

**I'm not really good at writing comedy so you may not find the story THAT hell of a funny thing. But I'm going to try my best on this! **

**Night 1: Sleepless Nights**

_Ilovemath has joined the conference_

Ilovemath: wow.. even in conversations I find myself alone. That's nice….

_Youkey has joined the conference_

Youkey: Zero! You're still up! Glad to find you here!

Ilovemath: hey… good eve…

Youkey: what's the matter? Are you hungry?

Ilovemath: no… Yuki, stop bringing things like that up please.

Youkey: oh… I'm very sorry… I was waiting for Kaname-sempai to go online.

Ilovemath: … Yuki, please! Will you leave kaname alone?

Youkey: eeeh?

Ilovemath: don't you know that he wears lipgloss?!

Youkey: who does?

Ilovemath: … Kuran-sempai.

Youkey: really? HE DOES?! O.o

Ilovemath: yeh.. I've read that in an online doujinshi some time ago…

Youkey: …oh…

Ilovemath: and he's just using you for his eebul plans!

Youkey: what kind of plants?

Ilovemath: …. Pants!

Youkey: Pants?!

Ilovemath: I meant… plans…

Youkey: oh… okay! :D

Ilovemath: … anyway, Kaname sucks…

Youkey: of course he sucks he's a vampire….you too, Zero.

Ilovemath: ... you don't get it…

Youkey: what do you want me to get?

_Iamhot joins the conversation_

Ilovemath: anyway, he uses curlers on his hair!

Youkey: Good evening, Kaname-sempai!

Iamhot: good evening, Yuki…

Iamhot: and who uses curlers on his hair?

Ilovemath: you obviously know who does, Kuran-sempai.

Iamhot: I think Toga uses one…

Ilovemath: don't you dare mock my teacher Kuran!

Youkey: hey guys? No fighting here okay?! Don't you think the fans are getting enough already of the love triangle issue here in vampire knight?

Ilovemath: and I'm the one who's being affected the most, because Kuran gets all he wants… meanie.

Iamhot: of course. After all, Matsuri Hino-sama made me the way I am. A beautiful vampire.

Ilovemath: that's gay.

Iamhot: no I'm not.

Youkey: stop thiisss! I can't handle this anymore!

_Youkey has left the conversation_

Ilovemath: Yuki?! YUKIII?!

Iamhot: great going, Kiryuu-kun.

Ilovemath: great going some gay vampire who uses lipgloss and curlers on his hair! And who even wears his shirt a few buttons off just to make some fangirls suffer severe nosebleed!

_Ilovemath has left the conversation_

Iamhot: well, I am hot. Is there something wrong about being proud of it?

Iamhot: …

_Iluvpunishment has joined the conference_

Iluvpunishment: haha! Kaname-sama wouldn't know that I go online at this hour! WEEE!!

Iamhot: Aidou…

Iluvpunishment: aaa! O.o dorm head…

Iamhot: I'll have a talk with you tomorrow.

Iluvpunishment: understood…

_Iluvpunishment has left the conversation_

Iamhot: ….

_Iamhot has left the conversation_


	2. Too long to Type

**Night 2: Why Zero Loves Math and the Arrival of Some Guy**

There was a loud snore coming from one of the rooms in the sun dorm. ( Not really sure If its really sun dorm. Heck, the night class resides in moon dorm, so the day class students must reside in sun dorm. ) Ah, there she is! Our day class prefect, Yuki Cross, snoring herself out. She could've slept all day, until some unknown force opened the window curtains and the hurtful rays of the sun blinding her.

"AAAGHH! My eyes!! My eyes!" She stopped.

"Hey, I'm not a vampire yet, am I? Well I guess its okay to go out." Yuki energetically grabbed her day class uniform and undid her night clothes. She was humming happily the song 'Why by Ayaka'. After ribboning the damn ribbon of her uniform that's always keeping her late because she doesn't get to tie the ribbon straight, and its always slanted to the side. After successfully doing so after 30 minutes, she decided to grab her bag and make her way towards her class.

Before opening the door, she noticed her friend, Zero, standing behind her. Damn him. She's still angry with him because of the fight last night between him and her beloved Kaname. Well, its no biggie. She's just not going to talk to him until he realizes that he's wrong.

"Yuki, aren't you going to open the door?" he asked as he pointed at the handle.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot. I was going to do that, honest!" Yuki just broke her evil plan of ignoring the guy, but then she managed to forget what just happened and succeeded on her daily task of opening the door.

"Congratulations Yuki! Yoo deed eeet! Mnyahahaha!!" Yuki congratulated herself as she opened the door and took a step towards the classroom. There she finds her classmates without a teacher.

"Hey! The flat-chested prefect is late!" one of the students said as he pointed at Yuki. Yuki turned to her back to see Zero.

"Hey, that's not a nice thing to say to Zero!" Yuki said, crossing her arms. Zero shook his head, he couldn't believe that Yuki was this stupid. Anyway, moving on. The subject was boring. Math was the subject, almost everyone wet the table because they were drooling themselves out. But Zero is determined to pass the subject.

"Kiryuu-kun! What is your answer?" the teacher asked.

"Wait! I'm almost done! Don't tell me! Don't tell me!" Zero said as he rubbed his pencil until it sparked.

"Kiryuu-kun, let me see your paper." The teacher said as she approached the poor student who was suffering severe seizure of the brain because of math.

"No! No! Teacher! I can do this!" Zero kept on saying. The teacher managed to steal Zero's paper away from him. It seemed that everything were too fast for Zero's poor brain. The pressure of an important thing taken away from him seemed like its being taken away from him.

"Kiryuu-kun? Congratulations." The teacher said. Everyone woke up as soon as they heard the teacher congratulate someone for their hard work in math. Zero couldn't help but drop his jaw as soon as the teacher was about to announce it.

"You got Zero." The teacher added.

"WTF?!" the day class students just couldn't believe their ears.

After a moment of time, Zero was laughing crazily, something like Yagami Raito's laugh, because they share the same voice actor. He couldn't almost breathe.

"Save me! Save me!"

After the terrible thing that happened in the classroom, Zero got out of the clinic together with his prefect friend, Yuki.

"Zero, what were you doing in math class? You got the teacher disappointed!" Yuki said as she was walking together with his prefect friend.

"I can't help it! That's why math is so fun!" Zero laughed himself out.

"Zero, calm down. Its such a shame to be killed by choking on your saliva. I wouldn't even have the nerve to attend your funeral with that kind of cause of death." She said, "And anyway, math is so boring! Where do you find the fun in math?"

"Because our teacher is so stupid! She kept saying that I get Zero every seatwork and test that we answer, and she kept on saying that I got Zero! Don't you get it? I AM ZERO!! Freaking stupid professor. Almost had me killed earlier." Zero cursed as he stepped on some random rock.

"Ow! Damn you, rock! That hurt!" he said.

"Oh yeaah… I never thought of that Zero. I guess it is rather funny!" Yuki laughed the same way that Zero was, apparently soon choking on her saliva, she was rushed by Zero to the infirmary.

After a few minutes, they were walking together from the infirmary again.

"Yuki, its such a shame if you're going to be killed by choking on your saliva. I wouldn't even have the nerve to attend your funeral with that kind of cause of death." Zero said, patting Yuki on her shoulders.

"Where did I hear that from before?" Yuki said, mockingly. "Ohmygosh it's Zero's clone!"

Zero immediately faced forward to find a walking clone of himself.

"Gasp!" Yuki gasped and eventually fainted.

"…You.."

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	3. Brotherly Love

**Night 3: Brotherly Love**

"I have returned…"

Zero couldn't believe his eyes, but it is true! There he is standing before him. His twin brother, Ichiru.

"Well, We've never met for a long time now! Can't you even say anything?" Ichiru asked as he crossed his arm, while waiting a particular response from his brother.

"Foolish little brother, if you hate me, despise me, go forth and gain power, run and run and cling to life." Zero said as he was reading some sort of script, while his twin just raised a brow.

"Oh, I'm sorry. This isn't what I'm supposed to say." Zero threw the paper away and grabbed a little piece of torn paper from his pocket.

"Greet Ichiru with a smile and say 'dear brother, you're here'." Zero stopped for a few seconds and faced his little brother.

"Oh. Dear brother, you're here." He said, with his normal flat face.

"I'm alright bro! Just wanted to say hi to you and… uh… that girl." Ichiru said as he pointed the woman lying on the ground.

"Oh, don't worry. She'll be fine later. Anyway, what's up with you?" Zero asked as he crossed his arms.

"I'm very sorry bro, I have to go. My fans are waiting for me in the limo." Ichiru said as he pointed at the limo with his thumb without turning his back on his brother. There, fangirls were waiting impatiently for the said person.

"GASP. Since when did you acquire so many fangirls?!" Zero asked.

"Well, not until I appeared in the manga. You were totally dumped bro." Ichiru replied with matching hand gestures that he learned from watching too much mtv's of rap.

"Stop it. You're disgracing our family's honor with your hand gestures." Zero said as he shivered, watching his brother give some unknown gestures of the hands.

"Yo bro, these are in! Anyway, that's why your fangirls turned your back on you cause you lacked style! And they said you are always so EMO." Ichiru answered.

"Oh yeah?! We'll you're just my little brother! I'm the older one so I'm hotter than you." Zero said.

"Says who?"

"Says me."

Ichiru just laughed.

"Fine. If that's what you think bro. Anyway, that tattoo is so a no-no. That's vandalism of the skin, bro. Why doesn't your discipline chairperson remind you of that?" Ichiru asked as he put on his shades and eventually began to walk away towards the limo.

"Anyway, I have to go." Ichiru waved goodbye to his brother.

"Come back, no good of a twin. I'm not done yet teaching you a lesson." Zero said as he brought bloody rose out.

"Now what? You're gonna shoot me with a fake gun? Here. Why don't you follow these guidelines. These'll help you." Ichiru's final words as he threw a magazine entitled 'Bishounens for Bishounens'. Eew. Looks like a magazine for gay guys like…

"Dorm head!" Aidou said as he opened the door of Kaname's room.

"What is it aidou?" Kaname asked, sitting up from his comfortable lying position.

"These magazines just arrived. Did you order these?" Aidou asked as he showed one of the copies of 'Bishounens for Bishounens' magazine. "And that's not it! Someone ordered a year's subscription! Are you the one responsible, Dorm head?!" Aidou couldn't help but speak his mind out to the dorm leader who just stood up and grabbed the copy of the magazine that he was holding.

"While you're at it, kindly bring me some lemonade. I'll surely appreciate it."

_**To be Continued…**_


	4. I don't like your Girlfriend

**Author's Notes:**

**Hey guys, to everyone whose reading… just to tell you, I have nothing against Matsuri Hino's genius ideas! I just want to make fun out of the information that were receiving from the wonderful author and the manga itself.**

**Night 4: I don't like your Girlfriend**

"Okay, step aside! Make way, make way!" Yuki shouted as she waved her arms side to side, signaling the day class girls about their squealing and such. As the racket goes bigger and bigger, she decided to blow her trusty whistle, only to deafen the ears of the students. Then suddenly, the gates opened, showing the beautiful vampires of the night class.

As usual, the dorm head, Kaname Kuran carries his thick books in his hands to show off to his fans that he is one smart vampire while curling his brown hair. Aidou was taking pictures of himself, Akatsuki was still asleep, Ichijo was humming his favorite song, My Immortal, and the lovebirds sweetly holding hands with each other namely Senri Shiki and Rima Touya. Both were sharing a sweet scented atmosphere until someone from the day class, stood infront of the night class students and pointed straight towards Shiki.

"Hey, Hey! You! You! I don't like your girlfriend!" she began to sing as she rolled her eyes towards the calm Rima.

"No way! No way, you can get a new one!" she said as she approached Shiki in a seductive sort of way, pushing Rima aside.

"Hey! Hey! You! You! I could be your girlfriend!" she continued as she began to undress Shiki's night class blazer.

"WTF?! Get outta my lover, biatch!" Rima said as she got her umbrella and tried hitting the said girl with it.

"And she's like, SO WHATEVER! And you could do, so much bet-ter! I think we should get together now!" she added as she protected herself from the umbrella.

"Don't you see? She uses a fancy dandy umbrella just to please you?! While I can do so much more!" she said as she knelt in front of Shikki, while Rima was running out of patience.

"Shikki! How could you?!" Rima said as she totally had it coming and ran off towards the academy.

"Hey, its nice to have a fangirl…" Shiki said as he turned his attention to his fangirl who has eyes of beating hearts.

"Kaname-kun, I can't believe you're bringing something like this to your classes!" Chairman cross said as he emphasized his idea, pointing at the magazine entitled 'Bishounens for Bishounens'.

"This is immorality!"

"Don't you think the series shows immoralities enough?" Kaname asked.

"What do you mean?"

Suddenly, Aidou pops out of nowhere and gets a whiteboard and a pen to explain things more easily for the chairman to understand.

"For example! Don't you think its rather weird? In one part of the manga, they actually show a scene where I, Hanabusa Aidou, and my dear cousin, Akatsuki Kain, were both sharing the same bed without even clothes on! Say, isn't that just weird? Now I hear the yaoi fans screaming!" Aidou explained as he drew himself and his cousin on the board with crooked lines.

"I Think there's nothing wrong with that unless you have a green minded brain…" Chairman said as he sipped his teacup.

"That's not all chairman! Another one at ichijo's birthday party! Shiki intentionally cut his palm with the breadknife, just to slowly lick the blood off! Don't you think that ichijo's going to get turned on by that?!" Aidou asked as he drew Shikki and Ichijou with a huge knife between the two with weird expressions on their faces.

"And that's not all! The scene between Yuki and Zero inside the bathroom was rather too much! What is thiiiis?!" Aidou asked as he rather messed up his drawings on the whiteboard.

"And that's not all, chairman!" Akatsuki appeared out of nowhere and grabbed Aidou's pen, and began to draw Aidou with an arrow that's pointing towards Kaname.

"You're always talking loud about the other issues but you don't quite explain yours." Kain explained, tapping the board with the tip of the pen.

"Akatsuki! Leave it at that! No further words coming from you!" Aidou said as he tried to stop his cousin to make some more issues.

"Chairman, Aidou currently has this obsession for our dormhead. He even catches the glass pieces of the lamp that Kaname-sama broke while he was angry at Aidou at one episode of the anime! What can you make out of that?" Kain explained as he waited for the chairman's response.

"Aidou… I want to have a talk with you." Kaname said as he pulled Aidou's collar as he exited the chairman's room.

"AKATSUKI!! You're going to pay for thisssss!!"

**TO BE CONTINUED…**


	5. Sleepless Nights 2

**Night 5: Sleepless Nights 2**

_Wild has joined the conference_

_She-key has joined the conference_

_Iluviamhot has joined the conference_

_Ilooklikemisa has joined the conference_

Wild: oh… hi guys.

Iluviamhot: wow, you're early.

She-key: I'm bored.

Ilooklikemisa: sigh…

Iluviamhot: I heard that Kaname-sama has the punishment wild on your cousin.

Wild: its his fault.

She-key: he never learns.

Ilooklikemisa: look who's talking…

She-key: …what?

Ilooklikemisa: you still haven' t made up on me on what happened with that stupid fangirl of yours, Shikki.

She-key: Do I have to make up on that?

Ilooklikemisa: ….

_Ilooklikemisa has left the conference_

She-key: what now?

Iluviamhot: you hurt her feelings, psycho.

She-key: I didn't know.

Iluviamhot: freak! Go drink her blood now! She might forgive you.

She-key: I was waiting for Ichijo-san to go online…

_Ilookliketamaki has joined the conference_

Ilookliketamaki: well! Hello fellow night class vampires!

Wild: wow, you're loud even in chatrooms.

She-key: Ichijo-san! :3

Wild: I smell something fishy.

Iluviamhot: they must've put a rule that gays are prohibited in the moon dorm.

Ilookliketamaki: hey, Ruka. That's not a nice thing to say.

Iluviamhot: …. I'm sorry.

She-key: how dare you mock Ichijo-san…

Iluviamhot: I smell the scent of three timing Rima here, Shiki.

She-key: No. I'm loyal to her. But her fancy umbrella kinda bores me already.

_Ilovemath has joined the conference_

Wild: who the hell is he?

Iluviamhot: no clue…

She-key: hello, I lovemath, I'm Senri Shiki.

Wild: Kain.

Ilookliketamaki: Ichijo.

Iluviamhot: Ruka.

Ilovemath: gah! VAMPIRES! And I thought I was in the romance chatroom. Die freaks!

Wild: oooh… Kiryu Zero. What brings you here in the romance section?

Ilovemath: now I know that you vampires are just renaming the monsters' section into romance to attract broken hearted people!

She-key: that's what we do for a living.

Ilookliketamaki: Shiki…

Ilovemath: anyway, you vampires are stupid.

Wild: well, look who's talking!

Ilovemath: and you all SUCK!

She-key: of course we suck. We're vampires.

Ilovemath: STUPIDITY IS A CRIME!!

Ilookliketamaki: indeed, kiryuu-kun, indeed.

Ilovemath: … where's your dormhead..?

Iluviamhot: what about Kaname-sama?

Ilovemath: he ordered a year's subscription of my brother's magazine. He forgot to pay me.

Wild: so the magazines that are scattered all around here belongs to dorm head?

Iluviamhot: LIES! Kaname-sama doesn't need that kind of leisure anymore! He has everything in the world that Is beautiful!

Ilovemath: that's why he's gay. He's tricking you all.

Iluviamhot: LIAR!!

Ilovemath: do vampires lie?

Wild: ………

She-key: ….

Ilookliketamaki: …

Iluviamhot: …….

_Iluviamhot has left the conference_

Wild: RUKA!!

_Wild has left the conference_

_Iluvpunishment has joined the conference_

Iluvpunishment: Akatsuki!! I have something to ask you!!

_Iamhot has joined the conference_

Ilovemath: aha! I knew you were going to get online!

Iamhot: Kiryuu-kun… good evening…

Ilovemath: no need for formal greetings son of a vampire.

Iluvpunishment: HOW DARE YOU CALL KANAME-SAMA THAT!!

She-key: ahh…

Ilookliketamaki: busted.:D

Iamhot: Aidou… I thought I prohibited you from using internet?

Iluvpunishment: I'm sorry, dorm head!

_Iluvpunishment has left the conference_

Iamhot: I have to deal with you some other time, Kiryuu-kun. As for now, I'll have Aidou give me a foot spa.

_Iamhot has left the conference_

Ilovemath: Freak. You're a gay, Kaname. GAY I SAY!

She-key: there's nothing wrong with being a gay… especially a bisexual…

Ilookliketamaki: yes you are right, Shiki. Anyway, have a goodnight. Shiki and I have something else to do.

She-key: Good night. Anyway, Zero, did anyone tell you that you look like Satoshi that dyed his hair silver and took his glasses off?

Ilookliketamaki: yeah… I never thought of that. Good one, Shiki. Now let's get going to our business.

_She-key has left the conference_

_Ilookliketamaki has left the conference_

Ilovemath: hmp, vampires.

_Ilovezeroshair has joined the conference_

Ilovemath: who are you?

Ilovezeroshair: afhjkasfdakjnsd safjn;

Ilovemath: oh shit. I left Yuki's laptop in Lily's stable!

_Ilovemath has left the conference_

Ilovezeroshair: aefohjklnbacdeigurjkdfn


	6. Lily's Diary

Author's Notes:

**Author's Notes: **

**Hey guys! I thank you all for reading and leaving comments on this fanfic parody of mine. Hehe! I hope you like this 6****th**** chapter. Enjoy, and I hope you really have fun reading this. :D**

**Night 6: Lily's Diary **

Grea fiqru,

Zero hgir ia o Ojsh, u fduhkd uje Ut akk auf

Et iowhfw oiwufowhf; oihwhflaf iagfiwqkhbdaqj

Khdaqkuwfdakwhdb kahfaskiwhdaiy iaushgdiastv

Askgdaskgdak layudhakshd vqb aoydd asodyas

Kashgvdakb aoyhdjbd avkjbFAM sfdJH  
AVDLB AASFDKAKBL agasdasbdaj asdjhgasdkw

'asmjhbaskgdsaklsjbd kasfhgkjy uuida masdkjohdbas djh  
andvavslda oasyuhgdyasi  
asdadgashasdhg askudgasogdaslod asf;afc;sohnyalif;d

Lkgfdl akudtgfaqytwf iauyfasytgf akiuydv

Jhc kausydkagoiv idiowy kiaugLVC

andvavslda oasyuhgdyasi  
asdadgashasdhg askudgasogdaslod asf;afc;sohnyalif;d

Lkgfdl akudtgfaqytwf iauyfasytgf akiuydv

Jhc kausydkagoiv idiowy kiaugLVC

andvavslda oasyuhgdyasi  
asdadgashasdhg askudgasogdaslod asf;afc;sohnyalif;d

Lkgfdl akudtgfaqytwf iauyfasytgf akiuydv

Jhc kausydkagoiv idiowy kiaugLVC

AKAKAKAKAKAKAKA

HDSD,

Asda

_**Okay, I know we all can't read horse language so here's the translation:**_

Translation:

Dear Diary,

Zero's hair is totally delicious! It's really nice to have him as a boyfriend!

I'm so lucky he tends to me every day that he finishes his study, or DOES HE?!

Anyway, his hot silver hair is getting to me. How did he acquire such hair color?

Did he dye his hair? He doesn't look old to me.

I wouldn't imagine myself having such an old boyfriend YUCK!

By the way, earlier, he was chatting while he was hanging out at my stable.

It was supposed to be a date, but NO! He was totally focused on that some device of his!

And he was totally snickering as he types some words on it,

But I don't know what!!

Damn it! It's so hard being a horse! I kicked his lights out while he was ignoring me.

He couldn't believe I kicked my boyfriend in the butt so he got emotionally hurt and then ran off, leaving the black rectangle device behind.

OMG, I found out that it was actually a site with tons of nude pictures of that dorm head of the moon dorm. I thought he hated that guy but wth? I think yaoi pairings are 'in' nowadays. Wow, some people. But no!! I won't accept it! Zero's totally not gay! I'd run off to a new owner if that happens!

Anyway, that poor lad's not himself lately. Something's bothering him about sunflowers. He told me! What's with the sunflowers?! And a limo he said… some sort of codes… he also mentioned something about a clone… and… stealing fangirls. Yeah, that's right.

Stupid me! I told him earlier that I love him and I want him to marry me, and all he could do is to pat me on the head?! Man, that hurt my feelings! Damn him! If ever he doesn't return my feelings, he'll GET IT! I'll make sure!! For sure!! I'll send that dorm head's nude pictures to everyone in cross academy, and I'm going to show him!!

MYAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

Love,

Lily! :3


	7. Zero's Diary

Author's Notes:

**Author's Notes:**

**Hey guys! I really appreciate your kind reviews!! :D –bowsbows-!! I'm finally making the next chapter. Ahehe… thanks for enjoying this fanfic everyone! I'm really glad! **

**Night 7: Zero's Diary**

Dear notebook,

They say that if you write your thoughts in your diary some of your burdens may come off and be transferred to the papers of the notebook… well, I guess I can try it for a while. This better work, you damn paper.

Gah, I don't know what to do. My fangirls are being taken away from me by my no-good-of-a-twin brother… Damn Ichiru. He'll pay for this. Anyway, since there's nothing to do, I woke up earlier. I met Yuki on my way to the classroom. She seemed disturbed. She couldn't even open the door. I wonder what's bugging her lately… I didn't even know she's so stupid. Why don't she leave Kaname alone? He sucks.. yeah, he does suck. Don't you think so too?! C'mon men, ANSWER ME!

Of course, the Kana Yuki fans won't understand my feelings. A while ago, I stumbled upon a girl who loves Kana Yuki pairings. She said to me, "Get the f-ck out of their life, Zero. Just be emo somewhere else." I mean… wtf… she didn't have to say that… freaking girl.. I'm hopeless enough.

While I was strolling along the lonely side of Cross academy, I passed by a field of sunflowers. Its amazing how they follow the direction of the sun… my teacher taught me that. After what happened, I was totally bored. I went to Lily's stable and found her eating the hay…doesn't she love my hair anymore? I feel useless now.. That nasty brat gets all he want. WHYYYYYY?? Freaking guy who loves to seduce girls… GASP! DON'T LOOK AT HIM WHEN HE'S SEDUCING YOU! HE MIGHT ONLY WANT YOUR BLOOD FROM YOUR NOSES!! At least that's what I think…. Gaaah.. my hand hurts already…

Anyway, I found Lily eating the hay then when I talked to her, she just stopped and stared at me. And I found yuki's laptop just lying at one side of the stable. Stupid… doesn't she know that she's taking all the Academy's wifi?! I attempted to shut it down but… when I moved the cursor… there it was!! NUDE PICTURES OF KANAME!! Man I almost had blood running out of my nose. Why?! How come she's looking at these pictures?! But I felt weird earlier. Something I've never felt before.. God what is this?! Can it be?! No! It can't be!! I'm not….. gaaah!!

Then all of a sudden Lily kicked me. That freaking horse. I TOOK CARE OF YOU SINCE YOU WERE A CUB!! Anyway, I noticed I had to do something about this. I'm not going to let Kaname take over my world… I'm going to fight for it!! C'mon my loyal fangirls! Whose with me?!

Wow… somehow I feel much better… Haha…. I know somehow my secrets are saved… no one's going to read this notebook anyway.. fangirls won't know what I've been going through…. –insert Yagami Raito laugh-.

Much kisses,

Zero :D


	8. Yuki's Diary

**Author's Notes:**

**Hehe! Hey guys! I'm glad you're enjoying this. I really, really, REALLY appreciate your kind reviews and such! I'm kinda relieved that Zero still has fans. Hehe! Cause I myself is a fan too. Anyway, here I present chapter 8! Have fun! **

**Night 8: Yuki's Diary**

Dear Kaname,

Wow, I'm so desperate I even named my diary after him. This morning, I wasn't myself. I was headed back to the classroom to find Zero. Sheesh, I was soooo annoyed at him for fighting with Kaname-sempai on the chatroom. Freak! Doesn't he know that I'm getting hurt when he's fighting with that hot hunk? The only thing that's keeping me for not suffering severe bloodloss from nosebleed when I see Kaname-sempai is this cotton ball I always stick up in my nose everytime that I have to go to the moon dorm. SIGH! Anyways, mean classmates. They called Zero a flat chested prefect! That's not a nice thing to say to a classmate and a prefect! So I had to protect him! SIGH! Life today.

Zero was weird a while ago at math class. But I guess when he told me the reason, I thought it was rather funny. I choked on my saliva, and Zero rushed me towards the infirmary. Only to be injected by the freaking gay nurse. NOOOO!! When I went out of the infirmary, I saw Zero talking to his clone! OMGZ! I thought clones we're not supposed to exist in this kind of time? It's really weird. Why does the chairman use candles for lighting while we have electricity and wifis in our dorms? We even have bathtubs here! GOODNESS! Such a stupid chairman. All he has to do is to press the switch on! Anyway…

I realized that I had to apologize for saying such things to Zero… DID I EVEN SAY ANYTHING?! Anyway, I just thought that I had to apologize for something, so I went to Lily's stable. When I went there she was eating hay… I thought she only wants to eat Zero's hair …. Because she has hair fetish. Why don't she eat her own hair from her tail, dammit. When I entered the stable I SAW IT WITH MY OWN EYES! MY LAPTOP WAS THERE!! WHO DID IT?! I left my laptop in my damn room! Does it mean that Yori… NO!! No! Yori is my best friend! But who did it?? I had to shut it off. They might think that I'm keeping all the academy's wifi to myself. When I took hold of the mouse, IT POPPED! A picture of a scary bunny… it had a flashing sign "s-x toys for sale" I don't know what that s-x toys are, but then it flashed, "DO YOU WANT TO WIN A MILLION YEN?! CLICK HERE!" Gosh, when that popped up, I got excited. I clicked it for about 9 times. Then it took me 30 minutes to wait for the page to load. Damn, it was just my email loaded with spams. All of it were spams but then an email from an anonymous person was there. I opened it. It says… I know you want these pictures, so I am now giving them to you. We both want it so why not share? Love lots, iluvpunishment. :D

Who the hell is iluvpunishment?! Whoever he/she is, he must've been some guy who doesn't like to be punished a lot. DUH?! His name says it all! Anyway, I seemed curious enough, heck. I AM ALWAYS CURIOUS AND GETTING INTO THE BUSINESSES OF OTHERS. Yeah. I was born that way by my… mother. I know, I'm smart enough to know that I have a mother who gave birth to me, you know! I want my mommy.. I started to download the file that the anonymous guy sent me. It stopped for until 99 percent… I was feeling emotionally unstable about my mother so I couldn't let the tears out. I had to run before the file could finish downloading. I went back to my room and cried… But I was still curious about on what the file is. I'll make sure to know what that is next time… for now, I just have to let all my feelings out. I don't want to keep it inside like Zero… man that guy's so emo lately. I'll have to stop here now…

Yuki :(


	9. Aidou's Diary

**Author's notes:**

**THANKS THANKS MUCH FOR READING THIS FIC!! XD I really really thank you guys :3 for supporting me and all with this fanfic. Anyway, I'd have to tell you before you read on. There is nothing wrong with this chapter. I made it this way for it to be more realistic for Aidou… hehe… anyway… you'll understand as you read on. Please enjoy! **

**Night 9: Aidou's Diary**

Dear Fifi,

Kaname-sama kept punishing me over and over again. 8D I don't care. I like being punished by Kaname-sama. Does that mean I'm a masochist? Or am I just crazy? Anyway, LOL! Gawd I wish that prefect would just go away. How dare he hate Kaname-sama that way? He's always lurking around with that no-good-of-a-gun of his and always points it at Kaname. Gawd. Makes me want to bite him. RAAARRR.. Akatsuki bought me a watermelon today. It sucked. He doesn't know how to buy good watermelons! What's the difference between watermelons and melons anyway? Like…. Apple and pineapple? Strawberry and berries? What difference does it make? Sheesh.. The names of the fruits today..

Wow! I've received the best gift of my life EVER!! Well, I thought Akatsuki would forget that its my birthday today but no! He gave me a surprise gift. It started out while we were on the chatroom. Lets see.. I have a print out of our conversation here.. aha! Here it is!

Iluvpunishment: sigh… what do I do? 

Wild: what do you want to do?

Iluvpunishment: Idk. I'm bored.

Wild: idk?

Iluvpunishment: it means 'I don't know', stupid.

Wild: oh.

Iluvpunishment: sigh…..

Wild: say.

Iluvpunishment: say what?

Wild: I have a surprise for you.

Iluvpunishment: REALLY? What?

Wild: at 10 o'clock, open the bathroom, the one that's in the living room, and walk towards the bathtub. You'll see something there. Do it tomorrow. It will me my birthday present to you.

Iluvpunishment: OMG REALLY?! THANKS AKATSUKI! I thought you'll forget my birthday.

Wild: …. Omg?

Iluvpunishment: -.- it meant 'ohmygod', bofo.

Wild: oh.

There. I did what Akatsuki told me! I brought my camera along so I could take a picture of what that surprise is. And there it was! Kaname-sama taking a hot steamy bath… hooomyyygoooshh… seems like time stopped. Kaname-sama washed his body smoothly and softly infront of me. Good thing I turned the flash off of my camera.. damn that was sooo sooooooo damn hot. Then he looked at me. The rubber duck on his head almost turned me off, but those eyes… DAMN THOSE EYES!! They make me gayer than I was before… the next thing I know, I was being taken to his punishment chamber and then he took his blazer off and he


	10. Kain's Diary

Author's Notes:

**Author's Notes:**

**Awww, guys, I really appreciate it! I'm really glad you like this fanfic of mine 8D ahem ahem…. Err anyways, I present to you, Kain's diary!**

**Night 10: Kain's Diary**

Dear deer,

This morning while I was walking down the street, singing doo a dee dee dee deed um dee dee doo, a girl walked up on me, saying "IDOL-SEMPAI!! 8D" with a dreamy fangirl face like Hanabusa's fangirls always has. And what I had in mind was… ookay? This is Kain you're talking to. Stupid… she has that heart eyes, like every random character has when someone bishie passes by.. you know… like that.. C'mon… Aidou's much shorter than me, and he's always being punished by dorm head. While I am a straight, standing tall silent guy that's always watching over him… but…. Sometimes I do think that I look 98 percent like my cousin Aidou. What do you think? -.- hmm.. Anyway, a guy who's wearing a black cloak that has red clouds, and he had a huge eye bag. Whoa. For how many days didn't you sleep man? Yeah, his hair was ponytailed. And he just walked passed me and said, "I'm deaaaad!!" Whoa man, that was creepy, and I just spent my afternoon reading naruto manga at onemanga… MAN! WHY DID ITACHI HAVE TA DIE?! I mean… I'm also proud that they named the organization after my name 8D! Anyway, I continued to walk towards the moon dorm. The living room was empty. I was bored so I checked the bulletin board. It says there "EVERYONE! DO NOT FORGET MY BIRTHDAY!! XD – Aidou" oooh. I almost forgot. Its my beloved cuz's birthday. How nice. I have to think of a neat present to give him. But what. Well, I was bored… oh, did I tell you I was bored already? Oh… I see. Well, I was bored, and … okay… I was bored and I sat down the sofa. I took my mp4 out and listened to Futatsu no kodou by on and off. MAN!! Its so cool. 8D you know? Akaku akaku akaku? Something something. Haha.

Anyway, I was thirsty so I got myself something to drink. When I was opening the fridge, there was a notebook inside. How in the world did that notebook appear in the fridge? Magic, maybe? Anyway, I didn't mind it. But when I caught a glimpse of it, saying "Do not read, property of Hot , sexy Kaname" I realized that it has a potential to be a gift for dear cuz's birthday. So I grabbed my drink and the notebook and went to my room.

I was reading it, man, the notebook's filled with that man's pictures! And pictures of ,lollipops? .. -.- that's odd. Hey what's this? SCHEDULE!! Here it is! See for yourself!

+Schedie! XD +

5:30 pm – wake up

5:32 pm – brush hair up

5: 35pm – 5: 40 pm – walk seductively with hips swaying towards the bathroom

5:40 – 6: 40 pm – take a fangbrush

6:40 – 7:00 pm – wipe wet body with soft, fluffy towel slooowly..

7:00 – 7:30 pm – wear uniform slowly but surely

7:30 pm– walk down to the living room and fetch others to form in line for class

9:30 pm – return back to dorm, walk to room

10 pm- take a hot steamy bath

The last one hit me.

It was still processing in my brain when Hanabusa buzzed me through the yahoo messenger. He was sending me some words like 'idk' and 'omg' whatnot. Damn these, I didn't know these were hip. Anyway I told him about a surprise birthday gift. He was so excited about it. After that, the internet crashed. WTF?! STUUPEEED INTERNEET! Anyway, I had nothing else to do but to sleep tight. But something bugs me. Something about Aidou getting punished. But … nah..

The next day, I saw Aidou walked down from his room at 10 pm sharp and walked towards the bathroom. Oh Man, here it is. After a few minutes, Kaname-sama was dragging Aidou to his room. Who knows what happened. When Cuz got back in his room, I followed him just to ask what happened. When I opened the door! He was lying unconscious on his desk! His nose was bleeding and his pen was broken into half. I thought about what happened, and oh… he was writing his diary about what he saw in the bathroom. His brain couldn't process the hotness of the dorm head so he suffered severe nosebleed. He couldn't even continue his entry on his diary. Oh well. I guess I'll have to carry my poor cuz. Anyway, this will be all. I'd have to nurse my cuz back to health.

Hugs and Kisses,

Kain 8D


	11. Kaname's Diary

**Author's notes:**

**Yup… they're cousins alright. I also think that Kain looks like Aidou too! When I was reading the manga, I was confused on who's Kain and who's Aidou. But now I know the difference. Hey guys, I really thank you for your kind reviews! –bowbows- anyway, here I present to you… the last… diary! Please enjoy! 8D  
**

**Night 11: Kaname's Diary**

Dear Monchichi,

The moon dorm's being refurnished and repainted today… I can't even make choco chip muffins! Damn carpenters. My beauty sleep is also being disturbed by their nosy hammers. Anyway, I had to go downtown today., because my apron was snatched away by some guy who has some chestnut hair that's ponytailed. He has glasses too. Man I'm going to report him to the chairman! That apron was my favorite! It had teddy bears on it. Damn you fugly snatcher. I'll catch you someday!

As I went downtown, people were looking at me. They must be amazed on how beautiful I am. HOHOHO. Envy is one of the seven deadly sins people. I passed by a shop today. They sell crucifixes. Wow. These things amaze me. I'm going to buy one later. First, I have to buy an apron first. Damn that fugly apron thief. Damn him.

When I went to the shop, they have brand new aprons!! WEEE!! There was one with a flower design on it! And little piggies and hearts!! And kitties! I don't know which one to pick! Its an apron paradise! 0Well, the girls from the day class were suspiciously looking at me, why am I in an apron store. Well who cares? I unbuttoned some of the buttons of my shirt just to make them suffer nosebleed. Hah. Serves them right for not minding their own businesses. I had to decide. Since the aprons are all so cute, I decided to buy them all! Yeah! Little do they know that I'm using the class funds for my aprons. Nyahaha! I'm so eeeviiilll…

After paying for the aprons, I decided to head back to moon dorm. But before anything else. I saw him. He had silver whitish hair, he was brushing it up! And the wind seems to be on his side too! His hair smells like sunflowers… Damn my sunflower fetishness. I want that shampoo. He was wearing a white shirt that reached until his crotch and sexy jeans… omigosh is this love? My heart was pounding very fast. I had to let it all out. I… squealed like a girl. O.o then he turned to me. Wth?! Its Zero. D8 can't believe I find him sexy. Damn him. After sometime, someone asked who the hell screamed. I gave an excuse of knowing where the damsel in distress is and went for it. DAMN!! DAAMNN!!

I stopped infront of an old barber shop. Maybe I should get a haircut. This goldilocks cut really gets me annoyed sometimes. Its really hard to manage. Maybe I should… for a change. What haircut best fits me? You decide.

Well, I had to go back to the dorm now. Classes are almost starting.

I'm back! Class was boring. It took me a hard time to stay cool and calm you know. Well, after then, I got my schedule to see what I should do next. While reading it, I added a photo of the cute lollipop I saw earlier. I'm going to buy that lollipop tomorrow. Hah! I was thirsty of thinking of lollipops and I brought my schedule with me to the fridge. After getting something to drink, I walked back to my room and noticed my schedule had gone missing. NO!! D8 Where did I leave it?! WHERE?! They're going to find out what I'm doing!!

Kaname , calm down. Panicking will do you no good. It'll show up tomorrow. Anyway. I find my hips hurting lately. Maybe I swing it too much on the left… I should reduce my hip-swaying for a while. Who knows I might get muscle cramps.

Aidou got pictures of me taking a hot steamy bath. I showed him who's the boss after. I made him polish my fingernails in my torture chamber. I used all of the torture devices enough already, and Aidou seems to be enjoying it. D8 You're losing it Kuran. You need to think of more punishments for your dear slave. Mwahahhahahaa….

Kaname


	12. Kaname's Problem

Author's Notes:

**Author's Notes:**

**Hmm!! I'll add some yaoi too in some of the chapters so don't worry yaoi fans 8D. I'm a yaoi fan too myself 8D. Its hot, I tell ya. **

**Night 12: Kaname's Problem **

It was almost time for the night class to go to their classes and study. It wasn't that boring for the students who find Toga Yagari a hot guy. Vampires get nosebleeds too, you know. They can even save because they can drink their own blood and not their victim's. Well, good for their victims.

Kaname got up and brushed his hair.

"Hmm… what a weird dream I had. It was something about… Starbucks." He said to himself. Sighing, he told himself to forget about that weird dream and went to the bathroom to take a morning fangbrush. He was halted. His fangpaste was missing. His apron was snatched by a fugly apron snatcher and now this?

"This can't be. I have to do something about it…." He said to himself as he went to his drawer to look for his breath spray. Guess what? Its gone.

"… this can't be…" he calmly said to himself.

"MY BREATHSPRAAAAAY!!"

Everyone in the living room was alarmed. Especially Ruka and Aidou. Their beloved Kaname lost something important to him. Well, everyone heard except Kain. He was listening to his mp4. Man, the hit song kept him addicted.

"The seaweed is always greener, in somebody else's lake…" Kain sang. The others turned to him in weirdness. What is he talking about? There are no seaweeds here in Cross academy.

"THIS CAN'T BEEE!"

When they heard the second time Kaname screamed, Aidou went for it.

"Dorm head!!"

Then everyone followed. They were so shocked when they found Kaname crying like a baby, hugging a pillow and throwing expensive figurines to the floor, while clutching his hair like crazy.

"Kaname-sama, what's wrong?!" Ruka asked as she dared to come near the dorm head, but Kain grabbed her hand.

"What?!" Ruka asked as she turned to Kain who was still listening to his mp4.

"Darling, its better down where it's wetter, take it from meee…" Kain sang as he looked into Ruka's eyes.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" She said, before she freed herself from Kain's hand.

"Kaname-sama!" Ruka said as she went to Kaname's aid. The poor guy was crying,. Aidou covered his mouth, because he couldn't bear to see Kaname this way.

"Ruka… you and the others… go to class without me.." Kaname mumbled behind his palm, cause he was covering his mouth with it as he was shedding tears.

"But why?! That would be skipping classes!" Ruka asked as she held the dorm head's shoulders.

"Dorm head… What's the reason?!" Aidou asked, before widening his eyes. "Is it because … of what happened in the bathroom?"

Everyone turned to Aidou except Kain.

"What happened in the bathroom?" They all asked together.

Aidou wasn't able to answer clearly.

"Where the sardine begin the beguine its music to mee…" Kain sang. Everyone was quite annoyed. Aidou knew what it meant for him.

"Aidou.." Kaname began to take his palm off his mouth.

"I ate garlic bread for midnight snack…"

**OH SHI-!!**

**1111111111111111111111111111111111**

Zero was walking with Yuki. Zero had this knot tied on his finger. He was supposed to do something.. But what? He remembers that it had something to do with laptop and Yuki. But what? Then it hit him. He grabbed Yuki's arm and faced her.

"Z…Zero?" she asked, having the same, oh-what-is-wrong-are-you-okay expression on her face, while looking at Zero.

"Yuki… I have something to tell you…" Zero turned to his oh-so-hot-serious-mode, while looking straight to Yuki's innocent eyes.

"…What is it?" she asked.

"Your…" he wasn't able to finish what he was saying when Yuki panicked.

"Omigosh I didn't do it I swear! I didn't know what it was I swear!! I swear I didn't look at iit!" Yuki screamed and then ran off.

"Your skirt is loose…" Zero finished his sentence as he was watching the girl running frantically with her skirt falling down her knees. He covered his eyes, but opened an eye.

"White with pink laces…"

Not too soon, a scream was heard.

**KYAAAAA!!  
**

"Yuki!"

Kaname was startled. He has long-range of hearing when it comes to his beloved girl. But he couldn't move. He was too worried that Yuki might get away from him because he had garlic bread for midnight snack. That's totally a big turn off. He stood up and swiped his feet in his bunny slippers and went for it. Everyone was shocked when Kuran dashed quickly down from his room to the living room and out the dorm.

"I'm COOMIIIIIIING YUUUKIII!!"


	13. The Apron Thief Dilemma

**Night 13: The Apron Thief Dilemma**

"I'm Comiiiiing!!" Kaname screamed with all of his lungs to alert that Yuki will be saved and be over-protected when he arrives. The day class students were shocked to see the sexy, lovable vampire running out from the moon dorm, wearing pj's and cute bunny slippers, WITH a face mud on his beautiful sexy cheeks.

"K-kaname-sempai?!" the girls couldn't believe what their eyes send through their brains. They never knew that the dorm head was actually trying his best just to look sexy and smooth for them.

"Yu gasp gasp Ki!! Gasp gasp!" Kaname puffed air in and out of his chest as he was staring down at the kneeling Yuki.

"Kaname-sempai… I didn't do it I swear!! It was loose!" Yuki tried to explain with her hands covering her embarrassed face, but her tears went ahead of her. "I just broke a rule of the academy which is 'Do not walk without any skirt on!'"

A Pause.

"What kind of prefect am I?!" she cried. Kaname was feeling pity for the girl, then he started to reach his hand out and slowly removed her hands which were covering her face.

"Yuki…Don't be afraid… everything's going to be fine…" Kaname assured his beloved girl. As soon as Yuki brought her eyes up at her beloved vampire, she squealed.

"MONSTEEEEER!! ARRRRGHHHHHHHH!!" Yuki immediately brought her skirt up and ran off frantically towards the sun dorm .

"Y-Yuki?!" Kaname was shocked as his favorite girl ran off. "Damn, I'm really losing it."

**3333333333333333333333333**

Meanwhile, Zero was watching the news in his dormitory, with a foot resting on a chair, and his back resting soundly on the backrest of his sofa.

"Now, we interrupt this program for a news flash."

Zero narrowed his eyes.

"Damn news. Nothing good ever happens."

"The rivalry poll of Zero Kiryuu and Kaname Kuran has brought millions of fans all over the globe to vote on who's the best of the best! A while ago, 42 points were deducted from Kaname , and were added to Zero's votes."

"What the?!" Zero couldn't believe what he was watching as he brought the seat closer to the television.

"Evidence shows that the dorm head of the moon dorm ran out of the dormitory with face pack on, and wearing bunny slippers! How cruel can this be?! Is Kaname Kuran losing it? Meanwhile, the rivalry between Zero Kiryuu and his twin brother Ichiru has yet to come to an end! With both having 150 votes, who is the fairest of them all?!"

"Whoah, they air this kind of stuff without even telling us. Man, we should get cash out of this!" Zero complained to himself as he crossed his arms.

"Who will win? Zero or Ichiru?! Remember guys! Vote for your best man! The winner will get 100,000 yen in cash! And the bishounen wrapped up in a laced box complete with colorful and cute wrapper! Just text EMOGUY to 28709 if you're voting for Zero, text GOLDILOCKGUY if you're voting for Kaname, and text EMOGUYLONGHAIREDVERSION to 28709 if you're voting for Ichiru. Remember. You get the cash, you also get the man."

Zero sighed, brushing his oh-so-wonderful hair up.

"Get on with the program."

"Now we present to you, BARNEY AND FRIENDS!!"

"Woohoo!! Awwriight!! I love that purple dinosaur!"

**3333333333333333333333333**

"Lalala… then add a cup of flour… and a cup of white sugar… and stir… and-" Kaien cross was busy baking a dark chocolate cake with sinfully dark chocolate chips on it.

"Chairman, I have to discuss some issues with you." Kaname just walked in the office without knocking on the door.

"Manners, Kaname. Manners." Kaien told Kaname while happily stirring the mixture of the cake.

"Oh… I'm sorry." Kaname apologized for being such a rude boy.

"Now do it again." Kaien said, shoving Kaname off while holding his handy dandy spatula. Kaname obeyed, slouching as he once again walked out of the room, closing the door. Then three knocks came.

"Yes?" Kaien asked as he was still focused on his mixture.

"Chairman, I have to discuss some issues with-"

"Ah, ah, aaah!! Kaname-kun? What do you do after knocking?" Kaien asked.

"… I walk?"

"No! first, you open the door!" Kaien explained, without even looking at Kaname.

"No, chairman. You turn the doorknob."

"No! You make your muscles on your arm to move!"

"Chairman, we're not getting anywhere."

"EXACTLY! Because we're not walking!"

"Uh.. chairman…"

Before being totally pissed off, Kaien turned to Kaname.

"What?!"

Kaname's eyes widened.

"THAT'S MY FAVORITE APRON!!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

**3333333333333333333333333**

**Author's notes: Okay! So now we have come to a portion where any character will answer your questions that you have asked through reviews and comments! I really, really appreciate you guys for that and now, I give you, Kain, Kaname and Zero! Let's give them a big hand!**

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP AIEEEE WILD-SEMPAAAAAIIII!!**

First off, a review from x-twilight-x, saying:

"**Hey x  
Rofl, I love this! XD You update really quick,Yay! Poor Kain and his computer-tardness. Atleast he gave Aido a really nice birthday surprise .  
Can't wait for the next one. Wonder what its gonna be...  
Ariana x"**

Kain: -cough-Err… yes. I also find myself poor for my damn internet. D8 Living without it is hard. It's even harder than standing under the scorching sun. Well, about my dear cuz, I also feel guilty about giving that birthday surprise for him because-

Kaname: -stares at Kain with a rather threatening look- ahem…

Kain: err… some things are not supposed to be explained… anyway, thank you for the comment Ariana. Hope to chat with you next time.

Second, from NeuviemeCiel:

"**Waahahahaa ! Kain is so lucky to found that schedule ! (Or it is Aidou ? xD)  
Everything make so much sens now !"**

Kain: err… well… I wasn't supposed to find that schedule. It was an accident ! D8

Kaname: … what schedule?

Kain: err, nothing dorm head. And… ITS AKATSUKI KAIN. Thank you.

Next is from scarlet-and-snow:

"**Yay! Got da 1st!**

--

Kain, I don't like ya anymore. Coz of ya, your cousin has to suffer."

Kain: D8 nuuuuu!! Ahem.. I meant… I didn't know that my dear cuz would suffer of what I did. Please forgive my irresponsibility.

Thank you Kain! Now this is addressed for Kaname-sempai.

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP AIYEEE KANAME SAMAAAAA CLAPCLAPCLAP SQUEAAL MARRY ME!!**

This review is from glozinga, saying:

"**HAHAHA! The part I loved the best was when he was gazing at Zero and squealed like a girl, only to realise it is the ever-so-sexy ZERO! HAHAH!**

Continue soon!! with more yaoi stuff if you don't mind...or not...

:)

Glozinga"

Kaname: -fixes hair- ahem… I'm afraid that was a mistake. –blushblush- I really thought it was a woman. In any case… -unbuttons some of the buttons of his shirt- I'm sexier than that damn soon-to-be-level-E, thank you very much.

From NeuviemeCiel:

"**:D Polishing nails xD That's very evil ! For a man with a sunflower fetish..."**

Kaname: a-ahem!! Well, -brushes hair up- I have to care for my nails every now and then. I don't like it when it gets too long. For saying that I'm evil, that's why I'm here. I'm the antagonist for some, and the leading man for some. For my sunflower fetish… -stares- have a problem with that…?

This is from glozinga!!:

"**HAHAHAHA!! Garlic bread for a midnight snack...hehehe...  
WOO! More Yaoi in future chapters you say?! I am there!!**

Continue soon...with...yaoi..., sorry I'm addicted to it.

:)

Glozinga"

Kaname: is there any problem having garlic bread as a midnight snack? Although I blame it for my breath problem this morning… and… Yaoi? Hmm… I'll think about it. –evil smirk-

Last but not the least, Zero Kiryuu!!

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP OH ZEROOOO I CAN ADOPT YOU IF YOU WANNTT I LIKE YOUR TATTOOO!! MARRY MEEE XD**

Zero: uh… cough.. is.. is this thing on?? Sorry I'm not really used to speaking in public… ah… cough cough –fixes necktie- -blushblush-

This is addressed to all three of you, from scarlet-and-snow!:

"**laughing secretly**

Kaname-kun! What happened? Duh, Zero saw...something! Anyway, what's the title of the song, Kain?"

Kaname: D8 gah… I have yet experienced being mugged. First, my teddy apron, second, my fangpaste, and third, my breathspray. I hope I catch the culprit sooner or later. And I will.

Zero: I… I saw something?? What? What did I see? –blushblush- I didn't see anything.

Kaname: -turns to Zero with a rather I'll-kill-you look-

Zero: h-honest…

Kain: well, if you're planning to download the song. It's entitled "Under the Sea, from the Little Mermaid soundtrack." Man, its so cool if you have it in your ipod.

**Author's Notes: Thank you guys! This will be the end of the 13****th**** night! I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to ask our characters questions, and rest assured for they will answer it at the end of every chapter! Once again! I really thank you guys!!**

Kaname: uh… wait… please remember to vote for me…

Zero: Bullsh-t. Stop your campaigns.

Kaname: who are you calling bullsh-t, emo?

Zero: you are.

Kaname: oh yeah?!

Kain: wait, you guys, don't fight. Man!! Why'd you two sit beside each other anyway?!

Kaname and Zero: … -looks at each other-

Kain: just stop it… stop the camera stop the camera!!

**Author's notes: Oh well… see ya next night! :3**


	14. Randomness

**Night 14: Randomness**

"Chairmaaaan!! It's hooorriiiblleee!!" Yuki ran past the hallways of the academy just to be safe and sound in her chair-father's office.

"Chairmaaaaaan!! There's a-" Yuki was halted when she opened the door to see the chairman baking cakes with that girly apron on, and that hideous-looking Kaname.

"MOOOONNNNNSTTTEEEEEERRRR!!" Yuki screamed as she pointed at the confused looking Kaname. After screaming for 2 seconds, she stopped to catch her breath, and again pointed at Kaname.

"AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!!" screaming once again.

"Yuki, calm down." Kaname said as he slowly approached the screaming woman.

"DON'T COME NEAR MEEE…. AAAAAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!! Aaaa- ooh…" Yuki felt like her heart stopped and she needed some time to rest and breathe. Her body couldn't take the pressure anymore and fell unconscious on the floor.

"Yuukii!!" Chairman panicked, losing grip of the spatula which even has a little bit of grape paste which landed on cheek.

"Ick. Purple sucks." Kaname was planning to wipe the grape paste off his mud pack, while Chairman was pulling Yuki to the bedroom. Then the big doors opened. There came in Zero with his ever-so-jolly face.

"Ah… Kiryuu-kun…" Kaname couldn't believe what he saw. There was a slight heat that was coming from his cheeks which eventually turned pinkish.

"Ah… Kaname… what are you-" Zero was halted when he saw the purple thing on Kaname's cheek.

"Heeey! You like barney too?!" Zero asked as he happily put his arm on Kaname's shoulder. "huh, whut?" Kaname was unable to move when Zero made his move.

"Man, the series is to die for!! C'mon let's sing! Ahahaha!" Zero was totally losing it.

"I wuv yoo, yoo wuv mee, we're a happeee faaamaaallyyy , with a great big glomp and a kiss from mee and yoo! Won't you saaay yoo wuuv mee tooooo?"

Man. He was totally singing it off key. But the fact that Zero was singing a childish song seemed cute and funny for our blooming-gay here.

"Hahaha!! Okaaay enough of this crap." Zero was snapped back to reality as he stared at Kaname's face.

"Eeeww, mehn. Whut iizzzat thing?!" he asked as he pointed at Kaname's face covered with mudpack and grape paste.

"It's called, SOSSY, emo." Kaname answered. "Tch. Move aside. I'm going out."

**44444444444444444**

Kain was brushing his teeth. He just had a blood tablet for beverage a while ago because he was thirsty. Damn that blood tablet. He wanted a real blood. As he was rinsing his mouth, a red-colored liquid which was made by the blood tablet from his fang fell on the white shiny floor. After a few minutes, Kain got the towel and wiped his mouth dry. As he was about to go out of the bathroom, he saw the blood drop on the floor and stood at it for a while.

Shiki was talking to his blonde-pigtailed girl as he entered the moon dorm. The blonde girl really had it going for Shiki, holding his arm tightly and rubbing her cheek against the cloth of his uniform while squealing.

"Oh. My. God. SENRI SHIKI!" Rima was shocked as she saw her boyfriend who just came from outside the dorm.

"….Rima?!" Shiki was shocked. He then turned to his date, then back to Rima.

"Who the hell is she?!" Rima asked as she pointed at the blonde ponytailed girl that Shiki came in.

"I thought… she was you…" Shiki couldn't believe what he just did. Making out with another girl beneath the romantic light of the moon… and that wasn't Rima?!

"Hey YOU! Who the hell are you?!" Rima asked as she went forward and grabbed the girl's I.D. It says, 'Hi. I'm Amane Misa. 8D'

"Shiki, this is MISA!! And this girl doesn't belong here. " Rima said as she crossed her arms, waiting for Shiki's answer.

"I thought it said Rima." Shiki answered.

"What?! I don't belong here?! Omygosh." Misa started to panic.

"and you're supposed to be dead anyway, cause you jumped off a building. Freak." Rima said shoving Misa off towards the front door.

"B-But I thought he was Light-kun! I thought he was light-kun who ate L that's why he had long hair now! D8" Misa answered.

"No he's not. STOOOPEEED!" Rima answered, and kicked Misa off the moon dorm.

"Damn girl." She cursed inwardly. Shiki felt somehow guilty about it and bowed his head.

"I'm sorry.. Touya-san.."

Could it be?! Rima was totally shocked when Shiki started talking and apologizing for what happened.

"Shiki.."

"Hey guys, sorry to interrupt this romantic conversation… " Kain said as he entered the living room, scratching his head rather confusingly. Shiki and Rima turned to the guy speaking.

"Who was the last who used the bathroom?" Kain asked.

"Me." Shiki answered, raising his arm.

"WTF. You're having a period?!" Kain couldn't believe what information went through his mind.

RIma's eyes widened and turned to Shiki.

"I'm… having what?"

"Don't deny it, Shiki. I saw the blood on the floor. YOU'RE A FREAKIN' WOMAN!!" Kain said as he pointed at Shiki.

"B-bu-buuut…"

"HERMAPHRODIIIIITE!! AAAARRRRRGHHHHHH!!" Rima cried, and ran up her room.

"Man, that was horrible, Shiki. You didn't have to get your gender changed." Kain's last words before leaving poor confused Shiki alone in the living room.

"You should have asked who I was with, stooopeeed."

**44444444444444444**

Rima was crying on her pillow that Shiki gave her for her birthday.

"Damn Shiki. Lying to me all along… He was a SHEE!!" she cried and cried until she ran out of tears. Along her stages of crying, she snapped. She immediately bobbed her head up and walked towards the dresser. Looking at her hair, she realized Shiki must've grown tired of it. Always the same hairstyle. Even if it was against her own will, even it Shiki was a woman, she got scissors and curling utensils to change the style of her hair.

**44444444444444444**

Ruka was staring at her mirror. Man. She curled her hair for Kaname to notice her. So that they have the same hairstyle and curls. But she sighed.

"I will never get over Kaname-sama if I keep wearing my hair like this. D8." She said as she took a pair of scissors and cut her hair.

"Hey, Ruka! Can I borrow your laptop for a while? Mine's internet crashed. Damn it." Kain asked for permission as he opened Ruka's door.

"Go ahead. I won't be needing it anyway." Ruka said as she was busy cutting her locks off.

"Say, thanks duuude." Kain thanked her and immediately got her laptop and went to his room.

He was checking his mails. He was having conference with the others about pandas and cupcakes. D8. Then a pop up window whatnot bothered him. Hmmm… he was curious enough to check it out. It was an e-mail from ilovezeroshair. It had files attacked to the message which says "aksjdhajkdasdhadhsadadsa kskskws" Kain just raised a brow.

"Can't he type a little- HOLY SH-T!!"

Kain immediately minimized the window that he just downloaded that showed nude picture of their dorm head. But after a few seconds, he opened the window and looked at it closely.

"Man… I didn't know that he was… large"

**44444444444444444**

Zero was fixing his closet when a dark figure entered his room without even getting noticed by Zero.

"Coz everybody is kung fu fighting! Ha! Ha!" Zero sang as he was making karate gestures. "Your mind becomes fast as lightning!"

Man, he finally got over that barney song, but he got addicted to another song as well.

"Although the future is a little bit fright- mppph!"

The room was left empty with a window opened.

_**WHAT HAPPENED?!**_

**44444444444444444**

**Author's Notes: hope you liked the 14****th**** night! Now here I present to you, Kain, Kaien, and Kaname for your questions!**

**First, from x-twilight-x:**

"_**EMOGUY SENT TO 28709!!  
Lol, Kaname's name is being pulled through the mud XD Poor Kaname! I'd vote for him...but I don't like guys with apron fetishes...  
I agree with Zero, they should be getting paid for the polls, Lol. How much would be enough though?  
I want Zero wrapped up in a lace box with wrapper! Kaname's make-up might run  
Ariana x  
P.S.  
Kain rules! I would of voted for him if he was in the poll thingy!"**_

Kain: Thank you very much for your support… But I'm not interested in those poll thingies. They might mistake me for my cousin again.

Kaname: For your comment… Mud is really effective for me… and… I collect aprons… what's wrong with that? :3

**From scarlet-and-snow:**

_**Wah! ;p**_

Kaien-sama, might i know if it's cupcakes or cake that you're making, or probably mudpie. And, Kaname-kun, be happy! Somebody finally made use of your ahem 'precious' apron!

ps. Thank u! I'm finally acknowledged! 

Kaien: wee! You can call me chair-father if you want 8D. Anyway, as for what I'm baking, it was multi-flavored cupcakes! 8D it's really tasty yuuuummm 8D

Kaname: -.- No.i'm.not.happy. It's being used without my permission and it became dirty AND!! D8 it already has germs of oootheeersss . GAAAASSSPPP

**From glozinga:**

_**HELLO!! I am texting EMOGUY to 28709! GOO ZERO!!**_

Kaname, you thought Zero was a GIRL?! Must I ask?! Anyway, good thing you found the apron thief, I wonder what Kaname's and Chairman's reaction...

Continue soon! With Yaoi, maybe?

:)  


Kaname: why are you all so supportive of emo-guy? –pouts and crosses arms- :3 Well, yeah, You may ask. I really thought he was a GIRL. Cause those curves got me… excuse me.. can I have a tissue? My nose is bleeding… and yes! Thank you for rejoicing with me when I found the apron thief.

**Author's notes:**

**I thank you guys for your kind reviews!! XD bowsbows!! I hope to see you next chapter 8D**

Kain: that reminds me. Where's that emo guy?

Kaname: Zero?

Kaien: oh yeah. He was supposed to be here.

Kain: ……

Kaname: …. O.o

Kain: dorm head, you didn't do anything childish did you?

Kaname: of course now…


	15. Confusion

**Author's Notes:**

**Hello guys! Wazzup wazzup?!. 8D Anyway, I reviewed the past chapters of this fanfiction, and I really want to apologize for some freaking typos. Gah! I'm really sorry about that D8 bows bows!! Anyway, I present to you, Night 15!**

**Night 15: Confusion**

Kain immediately deleted the file that he downloaded from that anonymous freak who sent him the photos.

"Man, this is so totally going to Oprah." He said to himself as he turned the computer off. He gave it a thought for a while. He just couldn't believe that he was able to see that picture of their dorm head advertising briefs. Gasp. That was totally too much for the night.

The next day, Kaname suddenly woke up from his slumber. He remembered something.

"Man! What's happening to you?! You just found out that chairman's the apron thief, he could have been the fangpaste and the breathspray thief too!" he slapped himself. He couldn't believe that he didn't catch that. Man, he's stupid.

"Kaname-sama?"

"What is it, Ruka?" he asked. Ruka opened his door and stood before him.

"Kaname-sama, its almost time for-"

"OHMYGOSH!! Rima?!" Kaname panicked. He must be having hallucinations. The voice is Ruka, but the hair is… RIMA?!

"No, Kaname-sama! It's me, Ruka!" Ruka replied as she tried to calm down the freaking dorm head.

"**GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!**"

The voice of Kain and Shiki were heard from Kaname's room.

**555555555555555555555**

Kain and Shiki were surprised when they saw Rima. She had curly blonde locks…

"Rima, what happened to you?!" Kain asked as he tried to calm himself. Man, he had almost mistaken her as Ruka.

"Touya-san, why did you do this to your hair?" Shiki asked.

"Because I thought that you might be sick of seeing my hair always like this, so I decided to change it a little…" Rima answered Shiki, in a kind of choking way because she was hoping that he would notice her change of looks.

"That's not it… I still love you no matter how you look. Even if you turn bald…" Shiki was trying to calm Rima down by saying sugar-coated words to her.

"Even if she's bringing her fancy umbrella?" Kain asked, as he looked at Shiki rather doubtfully.

"Err… well, that's an exception…"

"Kain, Shiki! What is-" Ruka was running down the stairs, calling for both men's attention for help.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Kain and Shiki pointed at Ruka's hair, cause she had it pigtailed just like Rima's were before. Minutes later, both fainted.

"WHAT THE?!" Ruka was furious when she saw Rima wearing her former hairstyle.

"RUKA SOUEN! What the hell do you think you're doing with my hairstyle?!" Rima complained as she confronted the impostor who stole her hairstyle.

"and what do YOU think you're doing with MY hairstyle?!" the women slapped each other, and sooner created a mess throwing the expensive collections of the dorm head, throwing them at each other's faces.

"Everyone…"

The women were both halted from their noble fight scene, and both unconscious guys regained consciousness because of the voice of their dorm head that they heard. Looking up past the grand stairs of the moon dorm, there he stood: The most beautiful vampire in Cross Academy.

"We interrupt this heart-beat-stopping moment for an important newsflash! It seemed that Zero Kiryuu's fans were furiously voting for him that 50 votes were added to his poll! And he is hailed the most beautiful vampire in Cross Academy, taking Kuran Kaname's title."

Aidou couldn't believe what he heard when he was watching the news.

"Bullsh-t! Kaname-sama's the fairest of th-" Aidou was shocked when Kaname kicked the screen of the 21-inch flat screen television in their living room.

"D-dorm head…"

"Aidou… I'll have a word with you later."

**555555555555555555555**

Yuki was eating sugar-coated doughnuts that she dipped in hot chocolate made by her so-called-father while watching the news. She had crumbs all over her face. She was munching totally endlessly. As soon as the information about Zero being the hottest vampire in the academy, she stood up.

"AMVERIVABRR!!" she said. _Translation: "unbelievable"_

Before anything else, she grabbed a cup of tea and drank it all up, then ran to the boy's dorm to congratulate Zero for his just acclaimed title.

"Zero!!" As she opened the door of her childhood friend, she saw nothing but an empty, dark, room, and a bed with a collection of Barney the purple dinosaur stuffed toys.

"Z-Zero…?" she asked, once again. This time, one step at a time entering his room.

"Hey Zero, did you hear the news? They say that you're the hottest vampire now…I came here to congratulate you… wanna have a date?" she asked. But no answer. She kicked Zero's cabinet closed.

"Damn. I thought he wanted me all along!" she said to herself. But wait! Why was Zero's cabinet opened? Yuki began to wonder. She opened the cabinet again. The clothes were all topsy turvy, and some of it we're scattered on the floor!

"That means… something bad happened here…?" she asked herself. Ohoho Yuki! You're getting the hang of it! Seems like your brain is working just fine today. She then began sniffing the floor for more evidence, literally speaking. She paused, seeing a drop of liquid on the floor. She blinked, consecutively three times, and sniffed it. It smelled like… peanut butter and jelly. She then realized something and covered her nose.

"Maan!! Whoever's saliva is this didn't even care to brush his teeth!" she said to herself, before standing up.

"I have to tell chairman about this…"

**555555555555555555555**

Meanwhile, an anonymous guy was spreading peanut butter and jelly on his sandwich. Zero was finally conscious. His sight was a little blurry, but he saw a man with silver hair, and wears an old fashioned black coat on his back and was wearing headphones that the volume was so loud that he can hear the song 'Low by Florida'. Next thing he realized, he was tied up with an electronic padlock.

"Hey you…" he said. But the man was still busy rocking himself out while eating his sandwich with peanut butter and jelly.

"Hey!." Zero called out once again. Still no answer.

"HEY!! YOU!!"

Man, that was exhausting. But he got the man's attention alright. The man who turned out to be his no-good-of-a-twin brother, Ichiru.

"Ichiru?!" he was shocked.

"Oh… hey bro dude!" Ichiru finally got rid of his high-volumed headphone and approached his brother.

"What are you doing here… no… WHAT AM I DOING HERE?! I mean no!! Can I have some of the sandwich? I'm kinda hungry here." He asked. But Ichiru gave his brother an evil smirk.

"No you can't."

"Aw, c'mon bro. I'll give you my one and only barney stuffed toy." Zero bribed his brother about feeding him.

"Gasp!! You will?!" Ichiru couldn't believe what he just heard out of his brother's mouth. The soft stuffed toy with purplish color and the huge pair of nostrils always had him turned on, and when you squeeze the damn thing it sings the 'I love you, you love me' song. Man… he remembered the cruel times that he has been through just to borrow that stuffed toy from his brother.

_**Flashback:**_

"**I love you! You love me! We're a happy family!! Lalalala!!" Zero was still singing that song, but he still does not have the lyrics memorized then. **

"**Nii-chan…!" Ichiru was staring up at Zero who was playing with the barney doll at the top of the steep mountain. Man if he knew, that his brother was there because he was avoiding lending it to his brother. Then, Ichiru began climbing the mountain. **

"**Ichiru? What are you doing?" Zero asked as he bent down to watch his twin climb the mountain up. **

"**Nii-chan…. Can I borrow Barney?" Ichiru asked, smiling widely, hoping that his brother will lend it to him. **

"**Hmmm… after you climb up here." His brother answered. **

"**Uh…. A little help, brother?" Ichiru pleaded.**

"**Uhh.."**

"**Zero! Lend Barney to your brother!" the voice of their mother was heard from the kitchen. Zero pouted. Maaan. He wasn't done playing with Barney yet. When Ichiru was halfway there, he threw the stuffed toy down the mountain. **

"**Barneeeyy!!" Ichiru let go of the part which he was being supported and jumped after the barney to save it. He thought barney was going to die. After Zero heard his brother screaming, he laughed like Yagami Raito from deathnote. Then the day after, Ichiru suffered from a broken leg.**

"That's not all…" Ichiru added.

_**Another flashback…**_

"**Nee, Ichiru?" Zero asked as he went inside Ichiru's room. **

"**Nii-chan!" he was still smiling, although having a cast on his right foot because of his brother. **

"**Nee, Ichiru? How's your leg?" Zero asked. **

"**it's fine now!" Ichiru watched as his brother sat beside him. "Thanks for asking." **

"**Tell you what, Ichiru? I'm going to lend barney to you. But I left it downstairs. And my feet hurt because I walked home from school so I can't get it. " Zero tried to explain himself as he lied down on the bed. **

"**Don't worry brother! I'll just get it!" Ichiru cheerfully jumped off the bed and ran towards the stairs. Little did he know that his brother put liquid soap on the steps, so before reaching barney, he slipped, and broke his other leg. Then, Zero laughed like Yagami Raito, again. **

"How can I forget those cruel things you did to me for the sake of borrowing barney?!" Ichiru asked as Zero was finding Ichiru's lecture boring.

"Hey, bro. Both your legs were injured, but why were your eyes covered, and not your legs?" Zero, the smartass asked.

"Uh… that's because…" Ichiru couldn't answer his brother straight that he did that because he was idolizing Riku from Kingdom Hearts 2.

"Anyway, why did you bring me here?!" Zero asked.

"because I heard the news. You're the most beautiful vampire in Cross Academy now." Ichiru explained, staring evilly at his brother.

"I… I am?" Zero couldn't believe what he heart, and his twin confirmed the information with a nod.

"WOOHOO! AWRIGHT! Thanks to my beloved fans who voted for me! I really love you all!! " his smile reached his ears but his brother slapped him back to reality.

"Okay…. Now whut?" Zero asked.

"That's why I kidnapped you."

"Why?! So you can borrow MY BELOVED barney?!" Zero gasped.

"No, stupid! Because you're my twin!"

A pause.

"ooookaayyy? What's that got to do with this?" Zero asked.

"Whoever wins the fairest will be granted popularity all over the globe, and the chance to become a star! " Ichiru dreamily sighed.

"Oookayy? Why do you want to become a star?" Zero asked, once again.

"Cause, I wanna be the big dipper!"

A pause.

"You're losing it brother. Now release me!" Zero demanded. But he was shocked when Ichiru cut his hair exactly like his brother and added a tattoo on his neck with a permanent pen.

"What the hell are you doing?!"Zero asked.

"With this, everyone will think that I'm you, my dear brother! And I will become the big dipper!! Munyahahhah!!"

"Eeww..mehn… what's up with the 'evil laugh'?" Zero asked.

"Do you have a problem with the way I laugh?" Ichiru asked.

"It should be like –insert Yagami Raito laugh-" Ichiru was shocked and hid behind a chair.

"Ohmygosh. That was the creepiest laugh I ever heard D8." he said.

"hah! I'm so lucky I have the same voice actor as Yagami Light. Now release me. Or I'll torment you with my Yagami-Light-Laugh. –insert yagami raito laugh-"

"I'm sorry bro. As much as I want to, that padlock is voice activated." Ichiru explained as he was grabbing his bag filled with lollipops to give to his fans on his way back to disguise himself as his brother.

"Damn you?! How can you do such a thing?!" Zero was starting to cry.

"Isn't it cool?! It won't open unless I say 'open sesame'." Ichiru replied.

_CLICK!_

The siblings looked at each other.

"Oh sh-t."

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

**555555555555555555555**

**Author's Notes: I hope you like the 15****th**** night for today. I'm kinda experiencing writer's block so I don't know if I can even resume writing this fanfic or not D8. But don't worry! I'll try my best guys! I won't leave you hanging for long! **

**Here I present: Kaname, Kain, and Aidou-sempai!!**

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP AIEEEE IDOL SEMPAAII! WILD SEMPAIII KANAME SEMPAAIIII!!**

**FROM GLOZINGA:**

**I love it when Zero sings, how halarious!! Anyway, the reason I am supporting EMOGUY is because I am a massive FAN! YAY!! Ok, Kaname, are you suffering severe nosebleed from imagining Zero and his lovely curves? Cause I am!!:D**

Kaname: cough cough. No. I'm. Not. Cough cough… -.- Its just because of the heat.

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW:**

**Barney? Is a dino? From our imaginations?**

Heheh. Anyway. Kaname has it bad, coz of Zero. Zero-kun's singing the Kung Fu Fighting song? Hmm. That song's already famous even if that is the theme for the Filipino TV show 'Kung Fu Kids'! Listen to it on Cartoon Network! -nudgewinkwink-.

ps. Kain, I love ya again! But pls don't think of Shiki as a girl. Poor Rima dear.

Author's Notes: O.o Really? The Kung Fu song's famous over there? Wow!! I'm so proud! I'm a Filipino XD Yey!! But I don't watch Kung Fu Kids, I only like the song. XD

Kain: I love you too, scarlet-and-snow…

Kain's fangirls: HUWAAAT?!

Kain: -blushblush- coughcough. Uhh.. I'm not really sure of what to think about Shiki.

Rima: -crying in the background- Shiki's a she… HE's A SHEEE!! NOooooo!!

Kain: sigh… Well, I guess we have some things to fix here.

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X:**

**Hey again x  
Lol, is Kaname getting rid of the competition? Poor emo guy XD Regarding the apron comment, nothings wrong with collecting aprons...just not in a fetishist way...fetishist isn't a word, oh well shrug  
Btw, Is Yuuki on crack or something? She's screaming all over the place lol. If she is, I bet it was Aido who gave her the crack...  
Ariana x**

Kaname: No, I'm not getting rid of the competition. I still have my loyal fangirls with me…

Fangirls at the back: KANAME-SEMPAI!! WE LOVE YOU!! L-O-V-E KA-NA-ME!! WEEE!!

Kaname: ahem! I don't have apron fetish.. I only like aprons… and… -looks up fetishist in a dictionary- yes. There's no such word. But vista's Microsoft word doesn't find it to be a strange word… I wonder… Anyway, you seem to have invented a new word. Congratulations. –sweet smile-

Aidou: o.o I'M INNOCENT! Yuki must've been crazy since then. Damn that girl. I hate her! Grrh..

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL:**

**God... My last review got crop. -.- So... I was saying "Dear Kaname-sama, I have nothing against sunflower, I really love sunflower ! Hahaha - nervous laugh -" Something like that...**

And... Is Lily sending nude picture of Kaname-sama ? :O  
I want the e-mail address of Lily.. xD

Kaname: I'm really sorry for that… -.-… Oh… Why thank you… We have the same taste in flowers at least. And… nude pictures of who? –stares- what's happening that I don't know of? -.-

Lily: !! _Translation: ilovezeroshairyahoo_

Author's notes: excuse meee! Horses are not allowed in the studio, thank you! :D

**FROM MEPHIS 85:**

**lol i love kain! so...large... LOLZ i almost died in that part haha thnx for updating it's so much fun to read this kanamexzero! WOOT and wtf zero singing barney Xd**

Kain: cough cough –blushblush- why thank you… I love you too…

Kain's fans: WWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTT?! D8

Kain: cough cough… I'm really sorry for saying such things. I really wanted this chapter to be wholesome but… I guess it really caome out. -.-

Kaname: O.o kanamexzero?

**FROM GODDESSOFWRATH:**

**Much Kisses? c'mon Zero wtf? hahahahahahahaha!**

Author's notes: we humbly apologize. Zero's phone is out of reach. Please try again later D8

**Kaname is so cute and deliciously evil!**

Kain: why thank you, Goddessofwrath. –sweetsmile-

**Hahahahahahahahahahaha! well i have a question for kain!  
DO YOU LIKE HOW BIG YOUR FRIEND IS?LOL OR ARE YOU JEALOUS?**

Kain: cough cough –blush- Between you and me… I'm actually jealous… -.-

**Author's notes, again and again:**

**Once again, thank you for the questions, and kind comments! Bows bows! Take care now! Byebye!!**

Kaname: -things deeply-

Kain: Dorm head?

Kaname: yes?

Kaname: what are you thinking of?

Aidou: ( me? XD )

Kaname: …nothing. ( Zero )

Kain: oh well, let's head back to the dorm.

Kaname: okay.


	16. Ichiru's Decision

**Night 16: Ichiru's Decision ( SPOILER ALERT, CHAPTER 40 OF THE MANGA )**

Kain was looking at the shiny vase of the flower. Amazed by the way it was made, he turned to his cousin who was sitting comfortably on the sofa, with a red hand mark on his cheek, the evidence that Kaname enjoyed b-tch-slapping him.

"Hey cuz?" he tried starting a conversation with his cousin.

"Eh? What is it, Akatsuki?" Aidou turned to him, rather startled. For he was waiting an hour for his cousin to ask what happened to his cheek.

"Are cottons fluffy?" Kain asked. Aidou nearly couldn't believe his ears.

"WHAT?! He dares talk to me about cottons… isn't he going to ask why I have this red hand mark on my cheek. D8" Aidou said to himself before breathing in to answer his cousin's question.

"I guess not." He replied.

"And why do you think internet is pronounced as 'innernet'?" Kain asked once again, looking at his gorgeous self at the mirror. "I mean, if they're even going to say that it is pronounced that way, why spell it with a 't'? After all, it is pronounced as 'internet'."

Aidou slapped his forehead. His cousin's curiosity kinda gets into him rather hard.

**6666666666666666**

Ruka was chatting on her laptop about bunny slippers, but that's not the point. She was also searching the different kinds of hairstyles on the internet as she realized that she had received a new e-mail.

"Yey! Email!" she was sooo happy before clicking it and reading who's it from. It was from ilovezeroshair. She narrowed her eyes. What a username. So fugly. Then she downloaded the attachment that was attached (duh) on the message saying 'askdhasdaad!' After scanning the file that seemed to be virus free, she opened it. Her narrowed eyes slowly became beeeeeeeeeeg eyes, after seeing the nude pictures of their dormhead.

"Kaname……sama….." her nose bled instantly. Without even noticing that Kaname opened her dorm room.

"Ruka, can I borrow your curlers?' hoho, he didn't mistake Ruka for Rima now. But he was confused. Ruka didn't answer him. By now, she should be answering him by 'yes Kaname-sama, you can even have them if you want! I'll buy you if you want! I'll do your hair If you want!!' But no. Something seems to be distracting her.

"Ruka, is something the mat- OMGWTFBBQ?!" Kaname couldn't believe what he saw on Ruka's computer screen. His nude pictures that was displayed for the Playboy and Women's magazine was there. OMG, and he was even promoting 'large sized briefs'. So that's what's keeping Ruka out of her sanity. Kaname immediately closed the window both of them were staring at and finally came to ask Ruka if she was alright. Man! That woman was drooling herself out. Then an outbreak of Cross academy's students' screams were heard from the day class dorms. All shocked because of seeing Kaname's nude pictures on their emails, all were aware of it except Yuki and the chairman.

"Chairman!" Yuki immediately began the conversation upon opening the door.

"Manners Yuki, Manners!" Chairman reminded, pointing at the door. "Now do it again."

"But, chairman, this is urgent!" Yuki saved herself from repeating the same thing again only to have senseless arguments with the chairman. She banged the table.

"Chairman! Someone snuck up on Zero's room and ate peanutbutter and jelly sandwich without even brushing his or her teeth!" she said. Chairman was rather shocked.

"Does Zero know about this?" he asked.

"I don't know. I guess he went somewhere." She answered. "Damn! He even promised to help me find the culprit who brought my laptop at Lily's stable! It almost crashed down! The horse was kicking the keyboard insane!"

"We have to tell Zero about this."

**6666666666666**

"Brother?" Ichiru started the conversation, looking at his brother.

"Yeah?"

Both were walking back towards Cross Academy.

"Why were you so attached to barney that you do not lend it to me?" Ichiru asked, turning to his brother, almost choking on his tears.

"Because… a special someone gave it to me…"

_**Flashback:**_

"_**Zero! Something's in the mail! Get it!" Mom ordered for Zero to check the mailbox, to find something wrapped in gift wrapped, with a ribbon. **_

"_**Wow! I wonder what's inside?" he asked himself, but before opening the box, he first took his time to read the card for whose it for. **_

"_**Dear Zero: you may not know me, and I may still don't know you. But I know deep in my heart that you exist in this world. Someday, we will meet… uh… I guess it will be in an academy ,and you will start to attack me with a knife. D8 but I know that you will understand me someday… this gift is for you. Btw, I'm a pureblood vampire… and my name is Kuran kaname. I hope to be good friends with you."**_

_**Zero narrowed his eyes. Just reading the name who sent it to him boiled his blood for some unknown reason, and he knew that he wasn't going to be close friends with this guy. But as soon as he opened the gift, a purple stuffed toy popped out greeting him with a pair of large nostrils and singing, "I love you, you love me" Zero painted a smile on his face, and in his heart. **_

"Really…?" Ichiru looked down. "I understand you now…"

"Ichiru…" Zero whispered as he began to touch his brother's cheek.

"We interrupt this so-called 'incest' moment for an important newsflash!"

The siblings were shocked to see the mini-television turned on inside Ichiru's bag to keep him updated about the everyday news.

"It seemed that for some unknown reason, Ichiru had gained a point higher than his twin brother! Now, the paparazzi will now search for him all over the globe and to appear in a tv show as a star!"

"OMGWTF?! Did you hear that bro?! I'm going to become the big dipper!" Ichiru couldn't believe what the news reporter had just told everyone in the globe. Zero was rather happy for his brother by taking his title. And soon, while his brother was out of his mind dancing all over the place like crazy, some guys took Ichiru away from him, riding in a white limo.

"ICHIRU!!" Zero began to run after the said limo but failed. His twin was kidnapped! Although he wanted his brother to know how it feels to be kidnapped but NO! His brother was kidnapped and its his duty to save him! He slowly unbuttoned his shirt to show a huge number 0 on his chest.

"Ichiru, I'll save you!!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

_**66666666666666**_

**Author's notes:**

**Gah… that was it. That's all that was left in my brain for now. D8 I have to squeeze my brain to know what's going to happen next. Anyway, here I present, Kaname, Rima, Ruka, Ichijo, Aidou and Kain! My apologies, the Kiryuu twins seem to be missing D8.**

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP AIEEEEEEEE IDOL-SEMPAI! WILD-SEMPAI! KANAME-SEMPAAAIII!! ICHIJO SEMPAIIII!!  
**

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X: **

_**Hey x  
Rofl, Ichiru wants to be the big dipper! Don't we all XD Mean Zero! Stupid Ichiru, breaking both his legs for a barney...Though the song is catchy.  
I made a new word! Awesome!  
Lies and slander, Aido.  
Everyone loves Kain lol. Good for him! But does no-one love Ichijo? I do XD (Random, oh well...)  
Hope you get over your writers block! Love this fic.  
Ariana x**_

Aidou: -.- I'm not lying, I swear. That woman got her brain cells damaged for another reason.

Kain: thank you, I'm flattered.

Ichijo: Hello there! :D I'm glad you love me! I love you too! :D

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL:**

_**Well, Kaname-sama, I think you should ask Idol-sempai... Or maybe, you could read the story too. You'll become even more powerful after that ! It's really fun to talk with you. :D -love-**_

And... Starting now I'm a Lily's fan ! :D

So, Zero is so evil for Barney ! I know, Barney is purple, purple is the coolest color on earth but... He could have kill is brother ! :O Ichiru is so cool... And he could have kill him ! Longer hair are better ! -bite Zero- (That was for Yuuki...)

-run-

Kaname: I'm sorry I have no time to explore the benefits of the internet… thank you… it's fun to have a conversation with you too. –smile-

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW:**

_**What!? You are a Filipino? Me too!**_

Anyway...

Rima, stop copying Ruka's hairstyle. Ruka, return to your old hairstyle. -- I can't imagine either of you exchanging hairstyles. Oh, and Zero, how dare ya be 'evil' to your precious twin! Ichiru, I give you the votes! Please appear in the commercial of Coke or Pepsi or Aquafresh! It would be fun...

ps...

Kain, I love yah! Can I marry you? v Forget your fangirls! Make me ya girlfriend! Also try to forget Ruka, she's a copycat! She copied Rima's cute pigtails!

Author's notes: Wooowww!! Do you speak Filipino? XD Kamusta ka? ( how are you? )

Rima: No I didn't copy her hairstyle! Why will I even do that?! I got this from a magazine! -.-

Ruka: But I like this hairstyle better! I look like a singer! (particularly Amane Misa)

Kain: uh… uhh.. forget Ruka?? –looks at Ruka-

Ruka: -.-

Kain: Let me think about it D8

**FROM GLOZINGA:**

**Oh no! Ichiru is EVIL! YAY!! ZERO is the HOTTEST Cross Academy Vampire!! Are you jealous Kaname??**

**  
Continue soon! With plenty of ZeroxKaname!!**

:)

Glozinga

Kaname: O.o.. –faints-

Kain and the others: Kaname-sama!!

**Author's notes:**

**Anyway, I really thank you for bearing with me! Anyway, have a good day! Good night! ( its night here in this part of the globe ) **


	17. Zero' Decision

**Night 17: Zero's Decision **

The night was young, and Kaname was busy lying down his soft fluffy bed, thinking about something. But deep inside, something seemed to be urging… he suddenly wanted to watch superhero movies for no such reasonable reason. He began to wonder. He got the remote control for the flat screen tv and watched the news.

"We interrupt your so-called reflections for this important newsflash! Ichiru Kiryuu had received higher votes from his fans all over the globe, claiming his brother's title."

Kaname was rather shocked. This couldn't be! He immediately grabbed his iphone and did some things with it.

**777777777777777**

As Zero was running frantically after the black limo, something inside his bag startled him. AH! It was his mini television again, reporting for duty.

"We interrupt this so called car-chase for this important newsflash!" Zero was kinda halted and was tempted to watch the news.

"It seemed that for some unknown reason, Zero's votes seemed to be rising up! Who is the one doing this?!"

Zero turned the mini television off.

"Bullsh-t."

**777777777777777**

"Nighttime sharpens, heightens each sensaaaaatiiooon!! Darkness Stiiiiiiiirssss…… and wakes-"

Ichiru was halted when the director just heard the news from the television.

"Zero's the hottest vampire now!" he said.

"But director, isn't he Zero?" the assistant director asked, pointing at the masked man who was singing.

"UH… no, I'm Ichiru. The twin."

"GET OUUUUT!!"

**777777777777777**

"DING DONG!"

The doorbell rang. Kain and the others were just talking to each other in the livingroom.

"IT'S HERE! WEEEEEEEEE!!" Aidou was happily running down his room to answer the door.

"Hanabusa? Why do you seem so excited about it?" Kain asked. Aidou just opened the door and received the package, kicking the delivery boy out, without even signing for the form.

"Its heeereee!! AHOHOHOHOH!!" he excitedly opened the box and the wrapper and the plastic wrapper to reveal the secret package.

"OMG, YOU BOUGHT IT?" Shiki was amazed when Aidou just took a Nintendo Wii out of the box.

"YES I DEEED!! Isn't it cool?! Now I can play with it! WEEEE!!" Aidou immediately hugged the software and quickly installed it to the television.

"I don't understand… why is it called Wii, anyway." Kain asked, scratching his head.

"WEEE!! This is fun!! WEEE!!" Aidou cheered as he was happily playing Wii sports.

"Does that answer your question, Akatsuki?" Shiki asked as he pointed at Aidou who was screaming 'weeeeeeeeeee' all over.

"Well, I guess that answers my ques-" Kain was halted when he saw Kaname standing up past the stairs, looking a little ragged, with huge eyebags.

"Dorm… head?"

Kaname narrowed his eyes before asking,

"Who's screaming so excitedly that disturbs my beauty sleep?" he asked.

Kain and Shiki slowly pointed to Aidou who was playing his energy out in the living room.

"Hanabusa…. Aidou…"

"D-d-dorm head?!"

**777777777777777**

"Hello, 911?" Kain asked as he called the station.

"Yes? What's the emergency?"

"An out-of-control vampire is harassing my cousin." He answered as he turned to his back, seeing Kaname making Aidou iron his hair, at the same time, polishing his nails.

"oh, that's bad. May I know who's speaking please?"

"Kain Akatsuki."

"You said, 'clean closet'? Is that right?"

"No. It's Kain Akatsuki."

"You said, 'crane cheesecake', is that right?"

"Crane cheesecake?! What the hell?!"

"You said,'crane cheesecake, what the hell'?!"

"Hey, are you looking for trouble?!"

"Hey are you looking for trouble?!"

"… crap."

Kain controlled his anger by putting the phone down. Meanwhile, the operator freaked out because someone called their agency 'crap'. A little later, a police was sent to the moon dorm. He came with three huge knocks.

Kain was startled. He immediately went to the door to see who it was.

"Hello? This is the moon dorm." Ichijo said, smiling at the scary person who was standing with a huge axe before him.

"Is there anyone here with the name Crane Cheesecake?" he asked. Ichijo paused for a moment.

"Uh… I'm afraid none. All we have here is Kuran Kaname, Hanabusa Aidou, Ichijou Takuma, that's me, Ruka Souen, Rima Touya, Senri Shiki and Kain Akatsuki." Ichijo said as he was counting eight in his fingers. Stupid Ichijo.

"Hmmm… I'm really sorry… I thought that there was a Crane Cheesecake here. I came for his head." The man stated. "He called 911 a crap."

"Ooh, that is bad… let's see… oh wait! Don't you think Kuran kaname sounds like Crane Cheesecake?"

Both stared at each other for a while, then a little later, Kaname was brought to prison.

"What am I doing here?! I don't belong heeere!!" Kaname cried as he was clutching the bars of his cell.

"Hey! Dude, you called 911 'crap'. That's a crime!" his cellmate said.

"Hey! I didn't call anyone 'crap'! And don't call me dude! And I never dialed 911 in my life! Well… except once…"

_**FLASHBACK…**_

"_**Huhuhuuu!! My notebook's gone! Who took iiit?! Mommy! Moommmyy!!" Kaname cried as he found his notebook gone. He was supposed to cheat in exams because he didn't have enough time to study. After the test, he was a complete disaster. There was nothing written on his paper, except his name. Then he found a payphone. His mother always reminded him to call 911 if he is in danger. He inserted a coin and began dialing. **_

"_**Hello, 911, what's the emergency."**_

"_**Uhh… ma'am my notebook's gone missing!" **_

"_**I'm sorry little kid, but this is for the Big emergencies only, understood?"**_

"_**But, this is BIG!"**_

"_**No it isn't. It's just a minor emergency. You might have just misplaced your notebook somewhere else."**_

"_**Your agency is CHEAP! CHEAP I TELL YOU!!"**_

_**AN HOUR LATER….**_

"_**is there someone in this classroom named, Crap Coffee?"**_

_**Kaname was surprised. He remembers that they mistook his name for Crap Coffee a while ago. But a little later, his seatmate raised his hand. He forgot that his name was actually Crap Coffee.**_

Kaname gasped.

"Crap … Coffee?!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED**_

**777777777777777**

**Author's notes:**

**Okay, writer's block again -.- I've been suffering of writer's block!! Gaaah! I need some datas D8 well, hehe, I still hope you enjoyed this chapter! Bowsbows! Anyway here I present, Kain, Ichijo, Shiki and Kaname! **

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE KANAME SEMPAI AIDOU SEMPAI KAIN SEMPAI ICHIJO SEMPAI SHIKII SEMPAAAAII AIEEEEE**

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL:**

**Kaname-sama was the one who give Barney ! :O He's becoming less evil ! Or... Maybe he got a plan ?! - And that make him more evil ! - But, he smiles... So, smiling is not evil...**

But... But... Zero don't love Barney 'cause it's - Barney is male or female ? - purple ? Zero should love purple more ! - purple flag -

ANYWAY ! The important thing is that Ichiru got kidnapped ! NO ! Who did that ?! WHO ?! He could died ! - again - He could get raped ! Be strong Ichiru ! Super-0 will save you ! - I will, but I'm not a manga character... and I'm even less in this story xD :( -

Kaname: Yes, I am the one who gave the toy to him… you'll know in the upcoming chapters why. –evilsmirk-

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW**

_**Ok lang ako.(i'm ok) Nasa Pinas ka ba? (are you in the Philippines) I'm here in Saudi eh.**_

Anyway, Ichijou, don't worry, I am one of your fangirls, too. XD plus, Kain is next to Shiki. Which means:  
1. Takuma Ichijou  
2. Senri Shiki  
3. Akatsuki Kain

Author's Notes: wahahah! YUP! Asa pinas ako. Anu naming ginagawa mujan? Vacation?? Orr…? Haha! Tama bang gawing chatroom to?

Ichijo: YEY!! Fangirl :D O.o and I never thought that I was the top on the list.

Shiki: I'm so touched TT

Kain: third is good. :3

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X**

_**Hey x  
Whoa, my reviews have been in...four chapters! Awesomeness!  
Lol, Zero had a 0 on his chest. Bet Ichiru has a one. Such a twincestuous pair. Their moment was very touching.  
Yay! You're the big dipper now Ichiru! Congratulations!  
Maybe you damaged her brains cells don't react well to ice, Aido...Though you probably did all that to Yuuki just to get a b-tch-slap from Kaname (You masochist...)  
Aw, thanks Ichijo XD  
Ariana x**_

Aidou: Haha! Does that make me a masochist? Heey! How come you saw through me?! You have some kind of brain reader huh!

Ichijo: no problem! :D

**FROM GLOZINGA:**

_**DARN ICHIRU! You took your brother's title!! ARGH...Kaname sent Zero the Barney toy?? HEHEHEHE...unexpected to say the least. Why did you send him a Barney's toy...really?**_

Continue soon, (with YAOI)!

:)

Glozinga

Kaname: it's a secret. –wink-

**Author's notes: that's it for now! XD hope to see you next chapter again! Buhbye! XD**


	18. Inspection of the Past

**Night 18: Inspection of the Past**

Yuki glanced at the back. Seemed normal, except someone seems to be missing. She turned back to her notebook, which doesn't even have notes only doodles of Kaname.

"I wonder where Zero is." She said to herself rather loudly. Yori heard it and asked her.

"Zero is missing?"

"Well, I don't know. The thing is, I was going to congratulate him because I heard on the news that he was now the hottest man here in Cross Academy. But when I got to his room, his clothes were all scattered on the floor, and I found a drop of saliva on the floor which smells like peanutbutter and jelly. Ick. Well, the weird thing is, Zero didn't even tell me where he went. D8 I'm kinda worried." Yuki said, as she was making doodles on her notebook about the thing she discovered.

"Well, you should be really worried, Yuki. What if Zero was kidnapped?"

"O.O"

**88888888888888888888888888888**

"CHairmaaan!!" Yuki frantically opened the door to see Kaien baking another cake. Man, the dining table is already filled with cakes. This man is surely addicted to baking.

"Yuki?!" Kaien was rather startled that he lost grip of the stirrer.

"Bad news, Zero was kidnapped!"

"What?!"

"He hasn't returned yet since last night when I reported that someone ate in his room without brushing his teeth."

"Hmmm, Yuki, who would you suspect that will keep Zero in hostage?"

Yuki gave it a thought before answering.

"I have an idea. We're going to have an inspection in the moon dorm. "

**88888888888888888888888888888**

Ichijo immediately opened the door after hearing the doorbell.

"Kaname?!" he asked. But Yuki and Chairman Cross just gave him a blank stare.

"Uh…"

"OHMYGOSH ITS AGATSUMA SOUBII!!" Ichijo was freaked out, pointing his finger at Kaien. Could it be that their worlds are colliding with the other worlds just like what happened in the horror movie that he just watched last night.

"Ichijo-sempai. Its Chairman…" Kaien said, comforting the nervous Ichijo down.

"Oh… I thought you were someone else chairman." Ichijo sighed, wiping some sweat that was coming out from his forehead.

"Anyway, we're going to perform an inspection. Zero had gone missing since last night." Yuki explained her case.

"Well, we need to inspect your dorms too." Aidou said as he stepped down the grand staircase.

"Aidou-sempai…?"

"Kaname-sama had gone missing too."

"EEEEEEHhhhhhhhhhh?!" Yuki almost suffered brain damage. Her beloved vampire was missing too! OMG. This can't be!

"Wait a minute, everyone! Don't panic! We'll just take turns on inspecting each dormitory." Kaien said, stopping the argument that was almost made.

"Very well then." Ichijo sighed, "Everyone! We're going to have an inspection! Make sure to throw all the gay things into the trash bin!"

Everyone was startled when they heard the announcement of their vice president. All kinds, lipsticks, headdresses, pictures of naked men, were all thrown into the trash bins.

Yuki and Kaien were amazed when a dozen of trash bins were filled with pictures of Kaname, Ichijo, Kain, and gay stuff.

"NOOOOOO!! Don't take them away from meee!" Aidou cried as he watched Kain tear all of his posters of Kaname posted on the ceiling and his walls, even his bathroom and closet. Ichijo stood on the door, kind of feeling sympathy for the poor man.

"Ichijo, wanna throw him to the bin too?" Kain asked as he pointed at his cousin who was crying rather loudly.

"He's not here…" Yuki was almost choking on her tears when she looked at all the trash bins that stood before her.

"You should've told us that you were looking for a person." Kain said, opening a bin to let his cousin breathe.

"Hey Hanabusa, you can come out now, they were looking for Zero."

**88888888888888888888888888888**

"How many years have you been here?" Kaname asked his cellmate, who is rather old, looks like he's already passed 100 years old.

"Haha… kaname. I never forget a face." Crap replied. Kaname stared at him blankly.

"You didn't answer me."

"I remember the days when you stuck a bubblegum up my thermos. Man that choked me."

"Uh… Crap… I was asking you a ques-"

"Now I paid back by stealing your notebook which is filled by nude pictures of silver-haired guys!"

Kaname was rather shocked. Now someone knew that he has silver-hair fetish. Someone knows that…

"You're GAY. You belong to the trash bin."

"SHUT UP CRAP!! I asked how old are you and all you can answer me was these kind of things!!" kaname was infuriated. He never really wanted to remember all those horrible things he did since kindergarten.

"Anyway, its been a hundred years since kinder. What are you up to now? And what happened to your face? Are you using some kind of miracle cream to keep yourself from aging?" Crap asked. Kaname gave it a thought before answering .

"Its because, I'm a pureblood."

"You're a poop lad?"

"A pureblood!!"

"Poop Lad… heh that 's nice."

"…crap.." Kaname just cursed inwardly.

"What?" Crap turned to him for calling his name.

"No. Nothing."

"Hey, Crap Coffee? You did your 100-year time. You're free to go." The security said as he opened the cell for Crap Coffee to come out. Crap was really happy to go.

"HAHAHA!! FREEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!" he screamed, startling all the prisoners in their lonely cells.

"Man, lucky him." One said, turning to his skeleton cellmate.

"He survived his 100-years time."

"I'm READEEYYY!! I'm ready!! I'm going to live again!! AND I'M GOING TO DO IT- GASP!" Crap suddenly paused, while grabbing his chest. Kaname was startled, then clutching the bars of the cell.

"What's the matter? Mr. Coffee?!" the security asked. Immediately, they called the paramedics. The medical team arrived when the old man was already lying face down on the ground. The doctor bent down and checked the condition of the patient.

"Heart attack."

The other prisoners freaked out. The cells have taken his life! Even though he was able to come out, he died, by having a heart attack. Then, panic began.

Kaname just sighed and sat down the wooden bed which was only chained on the stone wall, which broke down and Kaname's behind fell flat on the floor.

"Ow… stupid facilities. Don't they even care to give a pureblood quality lifestyle? I'll be staying here for the rest of the 100 years alone…" thinking of the fact that he is celled began to discourage him. He sniffed, three times, then eventually feeling tears falling down his eyes.

"MOOMMMYYYYYYY!! I want my mooommyyy……"

"Hey kid, better shut up." The security said as he pushed a familiar silver haired guy together with Kaname in his dark cell.

"Kiryuu-kun?" Kaname was startled to see his arch nemesis.

"Oh. Hey. Heard you had it bad against 911." Zero said as he sat infront of kaname.

"I told you, I'm innocent."

"Well, me too."

"Well, why are you here?"

"I'm being arrested for an illegal ownership of a bishie face and body." Zero answered. Both of them were silenced, until not for long, Zero began sniffing too.

"I WANT MY BROTHEEEEER.."

"I WANT MY MOOOMMMYY!!"

_**To be continued…**_

**8888888888888888888888888**

**Author's notes: whew! Finally I was able to update it! Anyway, currently experiencing author's block again. Heey!! So glad I'm finally going to cosplay Ichiru. Hope I portray him well XD. Here I give you Ichiru, Aidou, Yuki, and the barney plush. Due to under some circumstances, Zero and Kaname won't be able to make it. D8 oh well…**

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW:**

"_**oh..nag-aaral ako dito sa saudi, 2nd Year, sophomore pa langh..hehe... (i study here in saudi, a 2nd year, a sophomore)...sorry, kelangan ko pangh i-translate...hihi...**_

anyway...

'Crane Cheesecake/Akatsuki Kain' + 'Crap Coffee/Kaname kuran' to rotfwl..

hahaha! that was good!very good...

ps...do you have a friendster username? you can find mine on my profile here..."

Author's notes: waaaaaahhhh sophomore?? Cool… hehe thanks for finding it funny aaand… added you na sa friendster. I'm Jazzie :D

**FROM KASAI TENSHI:**

_**lawl, zero an ichiru remind me of the hitachiin twins from ouran XD (i bet kaname could be tamaki- personality, not looks) so it seems as kaname has a huge crush on 0 evil laugh oh, and i want to ask the barney plush toy if it likes ichiru, zero or kaname more. And where the hell is Yuuki?!**_

Author's notes: yup!! Hehe Hikaru and kaoru huh?

Barney Plush toy: I wuuv yoo , yooo wuv mee, weeeree a haappyyy famaallyyy with a great biiig huug and a kiss from me and yooo, won't you say you luuuvv mee too?

Yuki: I'm looking for Zero and Kaname-sempai! T.T where aaree theeey?

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL:**

_**Crap Coffee ?! xD Crane Cheesecake ?! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHERE THIS COME FORM ! 911 is more... erm... competent (?) here...**_

Oh, Aidou got a Wii... He's so lucky ! My mom try to buy one since like... nine month ! How do you did this miracle Aidou ?! And why does he disturb Kaname-sama's beauty sleep ?! In day time he most play with a tape on the mouth ! It make the sound less loud !

And Ichiru... Did he fall on the road and die ? NO ! He most get a long live and have a lot of twin baby ! - mini Ichiru/zero running everywhere -

And thanks to Kaname-sama who answer me again ! I feel important, the pure-blood keep talking to me.

Aidou: yes! I saved my allowance for one year just to buy it! You just have to have the determination to save something that you really want to have. And eeer… no. I don't have a tape here. D8 that will hurt you know.

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X:**

_**Hey x  
Oh! Ichiru was singing music of the night! Awesome! Was he wearing thr mask cause he was pretending to be the phantom, or just cause he tends to wear a mask?  
Aw, he lost his big-dipperness already. They say you have fifteen minutes of fame...he had about 2...and a half...  
I have psychic powers? That rocks XD I just thought you were reaslly easy to read, Aido...Kain on the other hand...  
After reading this chapter, I want cheesecake .  
Ariana x**_

Ichiru: I was given the role of Phantom because I have a mask. And I love the Phantom of the Opera. XD And yes, I lost my shine already. D8 its soo saaad. Sniff…

Author's Notes: well I guess that wraps this chapter up! Thank you everyone for enjoying this chapter… well, I hope… ahhaah XD see you next time! And take care!


	19. Backstabbers

**Author's Notes:**

**Waah, My apologies for updating kinda late. -.- College life is EVIL!! I have Saturday classes!! D8 its bad… Bad I tell you! Anyway! I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Night 19: Backstabbers**

_Itchyroo has joined the conference_

Itchyroo: I'm HOOOME!!

Itchyroo: hello people?

_Ilovemath has joined the conference_

Itchyroo: hey, who are you?

Ilovemath: this is the romance section. You invited me here, bofo.

Itchyroo: ooh… is that so? Maybe I just needed someone to talk to.

Ilovemath: shoot.

Itchyroo: I want my brother. I miss him.

Ilovemath: well, you're such a pity. I have a brother too. A twin brother and I don't miss him.

Itchyroo: well, that sucks.

Ilovemath: because he's a weakling. He even lied to me!! I thought he loved me when we were kids… but now I realized that he hated me soo much.

Itchyroo: wow, reminds me of my twin brother too.

Ilovemath: what's your case?

Itchyroo: I also have a twin. I always tell him I love him but now, I despise him. He's so freaking stupid for not realizing that.

Ilovemath: whoah.. he IS stupid.

Itchyroo: yeaaah… say. Maybe we can meet.

Ilovemath: no thanks, I'm a prisoner.

Itchyroo: O.o what case?

Ilovemath: illegal ownership of bishieness and a hot body.

Itchyroo: how many years?

Ilovemath: I don't know.

Itchyroo: awww…. That's sad maan.

Ilovemath: I know.

Ilovemath: but I'll get myself outta here. Along with my cellmate.

Itchyroo: cool!!

_Youkey has joined the conference_

Youkey: hey!! I need your help! Someone was kidnapped from our academy.. He's tall, wears pants and shirt! Has hair and earrings! Please tell me if you are him! Thank you!

_Youkey has left the conference_

Itchyroo: omg! That might be me!

Ilovemath: O.O

Ilovemath: you're a missing person?

Itchyroo: I don't know, but I'm tall, I wear pants and shirt! Earrings… I don't really know… I'll wear one now.

Ilovemath: ….

Itchyroo: there! HEYY!! I'M THE MISSING PERSON!!

_Ilovemath has left the conference_

Itchyroo: …. Crazy man. Hey? How was he able to log in when he's inside a prison cell?

_Ilovemath has joined the conference_

Ilovemath: it has wifi, DUDE. – kaname

_Ilovemath has left the conference_

Itchyroo: O.o did he just say Kaname?

_Itchyroo has left the conference_

**00000000000000000000**

_Wild has joined the conference_

_Iluviamhot has joined the conference_

Wild: Ah… Ruka.

Iluviamhot: Akatsuki. What brings you here?

Wild: nothing. And you?

Iluviamhot: I was going to ask people about Kaname-sama.

Wild: he was arrested a while ago for calling 911 a crap.

Iluviamhot: OMG seriously?!

Wild: yeah.

Wild: and why look for him anyway? He never returned your feelings.

Iluviamhot: …you're right… you're making me even more miserable. D;

Wild: I'm just being honest.

Iluviamhot: you're not helping!

Wild: seriously. Don't you think he's gay? I mean, he always wear lipgloss on his lips, he's always swaying his hips when he walks, and he's always leaving some buttons of his shirt loose. I mean, what more can he do for attention?

Iluviamhot: that's just mean, Akatsuki. You see, everyone here in cross academy is crazy for him! Even your cousin!

Wild: don't bring that gay-no-good-of-a-cousin of mine. He irritates me.

Iluviamhot: Aidou? Why?

Wild: firstly! He copies my hairstyle! Only changed it a bit, second, I always get reprimanded for his childish acts! And thirdly, I can't contain his gayness anymore.

Iluviamhot: you're mean, Akatsuki. Even to your cousin…

Wild: it's the truth. My blood is already boiling just thinking of those things.

Iluviamhot: then why think of it?

Wild: because I have a brain.

Iluviamhot: good for you.

Wild: ……..

Iluviamhot: ……

Iluviamhot: why do I have to suffer like this? Maybe I did so many bad things in my past life.

Wild: let's just say were roaches in our past lives.

Iluviamhot: you can name anything about being 'what' in our past lives and you chose roaches?

Wild: why? It's the first thing that popped into my head, and I just killed one right now.

Iluviamhot: well, I'm sure that roach will get his revenge on you on his next life.

Wild: no he won't.

Iluviamhot: yes he will.

Wild: this isn't getting anywhere huh?

Iluviamhot: yes… I mean no…. I mean, what am I supposed to say?

Wild: nevermind.

Iluviamhot: okay, nevermind then.

Wild: …. Okay

Wild: say, have you changed your hairstyle yet?

Iluviamhot: not really. Why?

Wild: Cause you freakin look like Touya, and I hate her!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?

Wild: yes, and stop it with the omg's. It's irritating me.

Iluviamhot: you seem moody today.

Wild: well, yes I am.

Iluviamhot: care to share?

Wild: no thanks, I'm not sharing my waffle.

Iluviamhot: not the waffle! The reason why you're upset.

Wild: oooohhh…

Iluviamhot: well?

Wild: I'm upset because I feel upset.

Iluviamhot: oh puhleezee…

Wild: yeah! And I feel upset because of someone!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Wild: yeah.

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Wild: uh…. Yes.

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Wild: YES YES YES!!

Iluviamhot: omg… seriously?!

Wild: ….

_Wild has left the conference_

Iluviamhot: omg… seriously… that got into him now?

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?!

_Iluviamhot has left the conference_

_**TO BE CONTINUED… **_

**Author' Notes: Gaaah!! That was finally over! Anyway, I give you Chairman, Kain, Aidou, and Ichiru! Due to some circumstances, Kaname wasn't able to make it. D8**

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X**

_**Hey x  
Loveless! The Chairman does look like Soubi! Lol, I'd never noticed that before XD Wonder if he also has a kid-fetish...  
Ichiru would make an awesome phantom XD All angsty and stuff...actually, thats pretty Zero-like...But he doesn't have a mask, so he can't .  
Aw, poor Crap. That should teach him not to mock 911 I guess.  
Lol, poor Aido! Had all his gay artifacts taken away from him!  
Though Kain had it right to put him in the bin XD That cracked me up!  
Can't wait for the next one!  
Ariana x**_

Chairman: well…. Kid-fetish? I don't know.. hmmm… maybe you'll know when you read my diary :D

Ichiru: I thank you for praising my phantom skillz! MWAHAHHAHA

Aidou: yes, it I sad! T.T

Kain: and thank you for finding it just right for me to put my dear cousin in the trashbin.

Aidou: hey! Ariana, that's not fair! D8

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL**

_**NO ! Crap died ! :( He has just free ! :( Por him ! :'(**_

Enough with crap. Zero and Kaname-sama are together in this small, dark, and lot of others scarys things room ! What will happens ?! :O:OO:O:O:OO:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O

Where is Ichiru ?! Will Yuuki find them ?! Where's Kaname-sama's mom ?!

And Aidou... The problem is that there never a single Wii in the store. There's always al sold ! :( Did you froze everyone, then run and grab the last one ?! I'm sure you did ! And for the tape, is Kaname-sama don't sleep well, the quality of his nude picture will crash down ! I don't want that !

Aidou: really huuuh? Well, it'll be best to freeze everyone up and grab them all! Munyahahaha!! But that's an illegal way. You might end up in prison.. but that's what I did and got away with it… As for your case… I think it'll be best to wait for the next batch of Wiis in your store! Hey! You can always stop over here and we could play together! 8D And, might I know what's your blood type ? –wink-

Kain: Hanabusa…

**FROM KITAISURU NI GAARA**

_**ok, D8 what an earth does that mean? Along with Bishie? That's what I'd liek to know.. but other than that this is hilarious**_

Aidou: -dresses up like a maid and grabs a stick and a blackboard- anyway, D8 is an emoticon! Imagine that D is the mouth, and 8 is the eyes! Its like a sad expression but not really… and Bishie means Pretty Boy! Just like Kaname-sama! XD Anyway, I hope that helped a lot :D

**FROM VIPERBLACK**

_**heyz (text EMOGUY to 28709)**_

kain you rock :) you and your cousin are completly differnt i find it sad people mix you up :( you and zero are my favorite people.

- deeply hurt by others stupidity

Kain: thanks for finding me completely different from my cousin .. and its an honor to be one of your favorites!

**FROM ****Jacky-JackandTheFunkybunch**

_**I love Kana-chan, even if he has apron fedish! Will Kana-chan marry me? p.s I text GOLDILOCKGUY to 28709! I**____**Kana-chan!**__** Kana-chanKana-chan,Kana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chan,Kana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chanKana-chan!**_

Kaname: -surfing from the prison's wifi- Yeey!! Thanks for loving me despite my apron fetish… marry you? That depends… what's your bloodtype?

**Author's notes:**

**That'll be all! Watch out for next chapter!! How will Zero and Kaname get out of Prison?! **


	20. Prison Break Part 1

**Author's notes:**

**Here it is guys! I'm sure you're all curious how Zero and Kaname manages to get out of jail… well, here it is…**

**Night 20: Prison Break part 1**

Zero was frustratedly writing on his diary, his back facing on Kaname, hiding the words that he's writing.

_**Diary,**_

_**Omfg. I don't like it here in jail. It's so emo… D8 and the people's cries always get to me. And what's more?! That sunovabeach Kuran is my cellmate. D8 Gosh, I can't do thiiiss… just looking at him makes me feel horny… scratch that! Not horny! Damn it, I didn't bring my correction fluid. Hey, don't get it to your head. I'm not feeling horny. I feel irritated! Yes! Exactly how **_

"Zero?"

He was startled, losing grip of his mighty pen because of the voice that he just heard behind him. Sheesh, Zero hugged his diary tightly, protecting all of its dark secrets from Kaname.

"Kuran, what the hell do you want…?"

He asked, irritatedly.

"What do plan to do about this?" Kaname asked as he sat indian seated infront of Zero.

"Dunno. What do you plan to do about this?" Zero asked.

"Hmm.. Dunno…"

"Hmph."

"But we have to get out of here somehow." Zero said as he stood up and raised his fist, which was burning with the flame of determination.

"OMG that's just so lame." Kaname said as he was watching the flame on Zero's fist.

"Whuuut? Don't make my fist angry." Zero said, narrowing his eyes, ready to fight.

"What- EVER emo man. Anyway, LEMME AWTA HIIR! I don't even deserve to be in this place because I did nothing! NOTHING AH SAAAY!!" Kaname said as he screamed, holding the bars of the cell.

"Don't we all have the same thing in mind?!" The other prisoners replied when they heard Kaname's cry. In fact, they were all innocent. The police were just so stupid to let the bad guys get away with the crime and make the innocent ones pay for it.

"I didn't ask for your opinions, suckers." Kaname cursed inwardly, hitting the metal pole with his foot.

"OWWW!! Geez!! That hurt!" he said as he was blowing his foot to make the ache go away. Zero raised a brow.

"So this is how Kuran acts when his fans turn their backs for a second. " Zero said, aloud for Kaname to hear. Hearing this, Kaname calmed himself and coughed quietly.

"Such words are unforgivable, Zero Kiryuu."

"Oh yeah, anyway. What's your reason for being here anyway?" Zero asked, Kaname immediately responded,

"It has nothing to do with you, but it seems that the reason was me calling 911 crap." Kaname replied, crossing his arms.

"HAHA LOL!! What a lame reason." Zero was struck by laughter when he heard the reason why Kuran was sent to prison. Such a LAME reason. LAME I SAY.

"Such a poise-less laugh. I bet your reason for being here is being emo." Kaname said, raising a brow. Hearing this, Zero showed his middle finger to Kaname.

"Sorry. But I was sent here for an illegal ownership of bishieness and a hot body." Followed by a seductive wink.

"Whuuuut?!" Kaname couldn't believe his ears. "How could you, Kiryuu Zero?!"

"Hah. Well, at least I can be proud of the reason why I'm here today." He smirked, "Its because of thiiiiis…." He said as he pointed at his piercings on his ears, "Thiiisss…", pointing at his tattoo on his neck, "and thiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssss" he said as he pat his silverish white hair.

"-.- no use to emphasize it." Kaname said, crossing his arms while watching the whitehaired guy boast himself.

"and according to survey, 75 percent of the girls find silver haired guys hotter and more seductive than that of brunettes, and conservative ones."

Kaname sighed. Guess he was letting Zero win for today.

"Add some piercings. It wouldn't hurt-" he stopped as Kaname raised a brow. "…that much…"

Zero remembered how he got his piercings done.

_**FLASHBACK…**_

"_**Next!"**_

"_**Hey mister piercer? Do I really have to?" **_

"_**yes , little silver haired boy. One day, these piercings will be something you will be proud of!"**_

"_**but I don wanna… eet huuurtss.."**_

"_**No it doesn't."**_

"_**Why don't you try it first mistah?"**_

"_**I already tried this one a couple of times."**_

"_**Couple isn't enough."**_

"_**okay little boy, let's get this over with, the other customers are waiting." **_

_**Zero looked behind him to see a brown haired guy that was waiting for him to finish. He wanted to get his tongue pierced. **_

"_**hmmm… why don't you do him first?" Zero asked as he pointed at the guy at his back. **_

"_**no can do boy. You're the first in line, and you're going to get your piercings done."**_

"_**but I don wan- OW!! OW!! OOOOWWW!! OOWW! OOOOWWWW!!"**_

"_**Done.. he's the last one. I'm sorry but you have to return tomorrow." **_

_**END OF FLASHBACK**_

"it was really aching that afternoon." Zero said as he was holding one of his earrings.

"I was supposed to get my tongue pierced too! I was the boy at your back, bafoon. But he wasn't able to do me because of your complaints. And when I got back the next day, due to some reason the piercer died of a heart attack. Unlucky me." Kaname sighed as he brushed his hair up.

"yeaahh… you know what? You'd be more hotter if your tongue was pierced and you act like… a bad-ss guy and not the prince charming act thing…. I'd give you four thumbsups." Zero said, winking at Kaname.

"OMG DID I JUST SAY THAT?!" Zero thought as he was brought back to reality. He couldn't' believe he has the so called 'inner gayness' in him that can activate any minute.

"I thought so… You couldn't resist me." Kaname said as he smirked.

"What the hell, watch your mouth, biatch. I never said anything like that." Zero denied, but the words that he just said proved something.

"Attention, all prisoners here are sentenced to have their head off later at midnight, ordered by the oh-so-powerful 911 agency. I repeat…"

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Kaname couldn't believe his ears. All prisoners?! Even the innocent ones?! A minute later after the announcement of the so called announcer, the other prisoners panicked for their lives too.

"So I guess all ends here." Zero said as he lied down on the bed that was fixed for him.

"What?! Aren't you going to do anything?! And why is your bed neatly fixed? They didn't even care to fix mine. D8" Kaname said as he pointed to the wooden platform that was lying on the floor, that was his bed earlier.

"I don't know. Why ask them? Anyway, don't bother. I want to rest peacefully before I get out of this world." Zero answered, closing his eyes to sleep.

"Announcement, after the mercy beheading which will occur later on, we are proud to announce that BRUNETTES WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!"

Zero woke up from his slumber upon hearing 'brunettes will take over the world'. Some random pictures took over his innocent mind. He was thinking that , once upon a time, there was Kaname, as he went downtown , he meets another Kaname, who is with another Kaname, and buys bread from another Kaname, and pays bills to another Kaname, which goes home to five other Kanames, which goes to work with Kaname as his co-workers and Kaname as his boss, who buys lunch from another Kaname, who hails a cab that is driven by another Kaname and-

"I WON'T ALLOW THIS!!" Zero said before his brain could go overload. He quickly grabbed Kaname's shoulders and shook the pureblood.

"We need to escape, Kuran. Even if it means working with you!" Zero said. Minutes later, both bishounens wore dark shades like secret agents do and plan their escape. Zero took his iphone and played the song 'Mission Impossble'. As the song was playing, the two bishounens were huddled up together planning their secret escape.

"Hey! What's that sound?" The security asked, as he walked over to Zero and Kaname's cell. Zero forgot that the phone can attract the securities' attention. Stupid him.

"I'm just having fun because I'm going to die later on?" Zero cleverly answered the security, who eventually believed him.

"Hey, you're so mean if you're going to ban me from enjoying the last minutes of my life!" Zero said as he crossed his arms.

"I didn't say anything like that….I was just asking…"

"Kaname, go, distract him…" Zero whispered loud enough for Kaname to hear.

"Now, for enlightenment…" Zero said as he made the security sat infront of the cell.

"Now bretheren! Listen to the words that I will say!! You there! Do you believe in magic?" he asked as he pointed at the amused face of the security.

"Actually I really don't believe in-"

"YOU HAAAVE TO BELIEVE IN MAGIC… YOOOOO HAAAVVV TOOOOOO…" Kaname said, trying to hypnotize the security by his crimson eyes.

"Oooohhh… OMG! YOU HAVE SORE EYESS!! OMG OMG OMG! GET THE F-CK AWAYY!!" the security panicked and took his pepperspray in his pocket and sprayed it on Kaname's oh so beautiful eyes.

"OOOOWWW OW OW OW OOOOWWW! SH-T MAN! THAT HUUURT!" kaname said as he tried to wipe the spray of his eyes. With that, plan A failed.

**0000000000000000**

"ready… set… DEEEG!" Zero said as he signaled for Kaname to dig in that little rodent hole for an exit. Kaname was like a digging dog, trying to burry his bone, since there were no shovels around, he was using his sharp nails for digging, which eventually had dirt stuck in them.

"Any progress?" Zero asked, looking at the hole Kaname was trying to improve.

"SUCCESS!!" Kaname was very proud of himself as he saw that his hand was able to fit in the hole.

"Stoopeed. We'll never make it till midnight!"

**0000000000000000**

The securities were all amazed by the show the actors were putting on.

"Zero… have I told you that…. " Kaname whispered, while caressing the cheek of the silverhaired guy.

"…Kaname…sama…" Zero replied, blushing bright redly, his face turned to another direction.

"Don't dare look away from me… Zero…"

"K-Kaname…sama….."

The next thing they know, blood flowed like a fountain from the securities noses. They couldn't handle such sight… such wondrous sight of two pretty boys wooing each other out.

"Ick… I hate blood."

Kaname said as he tried to rub off some blood from his blazer.

"Its over…" Zero said, sitting on the ground.

"Don't lose hope, Kiryuu-kun." Kaname replied, sitting beside his cellmate.

"Kuran…" Zero remembered something he brought with him to prison. He reached out for his bag and brought it out; the barney stuffed toy.

"That thing…" Kaname was startled. It was the toy that he gave Zero since they were children. But he wondered how Zero managed to bring it with him to this kind of place.

"It wasn't hard… Kaname…"

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_**Ichiru, I'll save you!"**_

"_**hey! You! You're under arrest!"**_

"_**Huh? Wha?!"**_

"_**You're being arrested for illegal ownership of bishieness and hot body." **_

"_**Whuuuut…."**_

"_**c'mon lets go. At least you're arrested for being hot."**_

"_**Hmmm… I guess that's something. Okay then."**_

"_**Let's go."**_

"_**Hey wait. Can I bring my stuffed toy along?"**_

"_**Whuuut?!"**_

"_**Awww c'mon. it'll be lonely in the cell right?"**_

"_**No way."**_

"_**NO WAY?! THEN I'M NOT GOING !"**_

"_**B-but…"**_

"_**I'm not going unless you allow me to bring Barney along!"**_

"_**ALRIGHT ALREADY!! BRING IT." **_

"_**YEEEEYYY!! THANK YOOOO!!"**_

"See. It was really hard." Zero said, shaking the barney stuffed toy infront of him. Kaname was kind of irritated watching the stuffed toy dancing like something. After some time, its eyes glowed.

"Bomb mode will self destruct in 3…2…1…"

"what the… HELL?!"

**TO BE CONTINUED…**

**Author's notes: there… I added a little yaoi for this chapter. Ahihihihi! Hope y'all liked it. Anyway here I present Aidou, Kain, Ruka, and Yuki! **

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X**

_**Hey x  
O.o Chairmans diary? I think the police should read it instead of me...  
Heh, life isn't fair Aido.  
Gr, Kain should shoot Ruka and save everyone from ever having to hear/read 'omg seriously?!' ever again, rofl.  
Wonder why Kain was in such a bad mood...pms? .  
Lol, Yuuki's amazing at finding missing people XD 'wears pants and a shirt!'. Well, that cuts out all the naturists then.  
Looking forward to the next one XD  
Ariana x**_

Aidou: Yes, I agree with you. Life isn't fair D8

Kain: yes, I have thought about doing that to Ruka but no… hmmm… something seems to be preventing me from doing so… and YES!! I hate her omg thingy-ma-jingy and… please don't type those two words… I find myself burning with irritation already D8. And, why am I such in a bad moon? I'll call you later.

Yuuki: Really?! Awww what a nice compliment! 8D

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW**

_**Ei! You forgot to add Shiki...and Rima...**_

And me... XD

Anyway, I believe that ItchyRoo and ILoveMath...are too stupid not to notice. And Kain's too dramatic for Ruka...what's up with you guys?

Author's notes: owyeah… I forgot to add them D8 and you too . shooweeeee

Kain: dramatic? That word just doesn't fit me. It fits Ruka better. 8D

Ruka: I'm just emotionally unstable because Kaname-sama doesn't notice me… waaaahhhh… do I need to change my looks now? My gender?! Do I need to dye my hair brown?!

Kain: DON'T.EVEN.HAVE.IDEAS.

Ruka: tell meeeee D8

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL**

_**I WANT TO SEE - READ ? - THIS ESCAPE ! There cloths could be thorns off by a lot of things ! :O:O:O I see the scene I my crazy mind ! :O -**_

Kain need some pills to calm down... And Ruka need to forget how to write "OMG".

And, Zero talk to Ichiru ! They don't even know this was each other ?! What kind of low category twin is that ? :O They should always know and it's the other ! :O The fact that they don't speak for long is not an excuse !

Oh ! Aidou, I'm A+. First quality blood ! And I don't get the power to freeze everybody... So, I'd need your help to do that ! xD I'm not a vampire... Even thought I got fangs, hate sun, find blood taste good, sleep the day... OH GOD ! AM I A VAMPIRE ?!

Kain: yes. I do need some pills to calm down, and yes. I want her to forget those freaking annoying words… gah. Do you have anything to suggest so that she will stop writing those words?

Aidou: A+ huuuuh?? Lemme think about it. -,..,- … OMG maybe you ARE a vampire! Say, why don't you enroll here in Cross Academy? I'll trade Akatsuki for you as a roommate! :3

**FROM JACKY-JACK  
**

_**Yay! Kana-chan! He loves me!! acorns are cool and so are you! and Im O+!**_

Kaname: -surfing from the prison cell- ?? are acorns cool? Hmmm I didn't know. O+?? hmmm that's my kind of blood :D

**Author's notes: **

**So I guess that' it for this chappie… anyway, see you on the part 2 of this!! XD **


	21. Prison Break Part 2

**Author's Notes:**

**OMG guys I really missed you all honest. Finally updating this chapter! Gaaah hope you'll all enjoy this!! College life really is stressful… anyway… please enjoy!**

**Night 21: Prison Break Part 2!!**

Shiki, Ichijo, Rima and Ruka were all watching the flat screen tv that Kaname gave them as a gift for last Christmas which they cannot fully enjoy because they have been arguing about what channel to watch. Shiki prefers the cooking channel, Rima the online shopping, Ichijo, the English 101 and Rima the fashion show. They were all arguing about different channels in one television! OMGWTFBBQ.

"Hey guys! Can someone help me with this?! " Aidou asked as he was running down the stairs that he stripped, and stood up again while waving the notebook on his hand, and mouthing a pencil on his lips.

"Its our logic assignment actually. I wouldn't be studying this much for logic… but I won't allow AND even accept that if I don't answer this questions correctly, my reputation will be down the drain!! And I don't want to get a failing grade in Logic. Please guys help mee…. Pleaaaaaaaaaase… The dorm head won't even bother teaching me. He just gave a clue saying… you need to think philosophically in order to answer these questions but eetsss soooo haaarrd too understaaaand… I mean his words are scribbles to me, anyone?! Help?" he asked. But the people seemed to be amazed with the flat screen in front of them. Sighing, he turns to the readers.

"Hey guys? Help me, pretty please? I know you're all smart out there. The least I can do is to have a date whoever helps me with this question! Sayyy… here goes: A father and his son met a motorbike accident. The father was rushed to the hospital, but on his way, the father died, and his son was sent to the emergency room. As soon as the son arrived, when the surgeon examined the kid, the surgeon said, 'I cannot operate because that's my son'. C'mon guys… I really don't get it… D8 help me please?? Thanks very much to all of you! Mwa mwa mwaaaah!!"

Kain was startled to see his cousin kissing the monitor of their laptop. Is he going nuts?!

"Oi, Hanabusa… what are you doing?" Kain asked as he slowly went down the stairs.

"Akatsukiiii… I can't find a way to solve this… I mean… I've thought of many possible answers but I'm not sure whether it's the right one or what?! D8 it's horrible…" Aidou began to cry. Kain snatched his cuz's notebook from his arm and read it. After a minute, he sighed, gave the notebook again to his cousin and said,

"If you won't be able to answer that, I don't wanna know you anymore. It's so damn easy."

"Easy for you to say!"

**1111111111111111111111111111**

_**BOOOM!!**_

After a huge explosion, a hole was made on the wall.

"Holy smoking cow." Zero muttered as he saw the big hole on the wall. Big enough for them to escape the horrors of the prison.

"Well, good thing I planted a bomb in there. I'm smart, am I?" Kaname said as he began to praise himself.

"Y'mean that bomb was really made for me?" Zero asked as he turned quite furious at Kaname.

"Well, what can I say? From the start I knew that we were going to be rivals so I planned it a little bit earlier."

"Son of a SENSORED…."

Kaname's eyes widened. He didn't know that Zero could seriously curse and call him names just like that.

"Hey, what's going on there? What's that noise all about?"

As soon as they heard the securities, they hurried to move closer to the whole. Surprised they were when they saw Cross Academy just beside their cell.

"WTF…"

They even saw the Chairman confusingly staring at them for some unknown reason. He had his wide smile up to his ears and he was waving rather mockingly at them. He didn't even know that they were imprisoned because of senseless reasons. Oh brother.

"Let's go." Kaname said as he began to push Zero towards the hole.

"Are you nuts?! That is 50 feet to the ground! Are you planning to kill me?!" Zero asked.

"Well, actually, I am."

"WHAAAAAAAAT THEEEEE-"

"But since I know that this story is going to take a bit longer than expected, I'll forget my real motives this time. Here. Wear this." Kaname said before he got a bunny eared headband from his pocket and a huge backpack from his pocket. Wow how does he do that?

"Nice pocket." Zero complimented.

"Why, thank you." Kaname replied and immediately made Zero wear the backpack.

"What is this for?" Zero asked, as he watched Kaname wear bunny eared headbands and the pink backpack.

"This is for coolness."

"We might get arrested again."

"Well, I you still have other stuffed toys that I sent…"

"WHAT?! You mean all of them-"

"Are bombs."

"WHAT?!"

"Don't worry. I'll treat you to dinner later."

"Okaay…? That was so totally random but fine. I choose Shakey's."

"Pizza Hut."

"oh what the hell…"

3…2…1…

JUMP!!

The two bishounens did. As they were 25 feet below, their parachutes opened. Maan… their parachutes were pink kitties that has a pink flower on their right ear. Well… better than Hello Kitty.

"Wtf, Kuran. You're so gay."

"Are you mocking me?!"

"Kinda."

"Oh."

"We are still going to eat at Pizza Hut."

"SHAKEY'S!!"

"I'm the one who's treating you."

"And I'm the one being treated, so I get to choose where I wanna eat."

"FINE!"

"WOOOT! I won! HEHEH! Wittier than a pureblood!"

"Are you mocking me?!"

Meanwhile, Yuki was totally desperate to look for the two missing persons.

"Please! Anyone! Have you seen these?!" she asked the students as she gave out fliers of pictures of Zero and Kaname which she got from photobucket and handed it out to the students. It wasn't a waste of ink really. They were two totally hot guys. Actually, the others were even paying for it. So Yuki was glad to have it as a business, at the same time, a job. Then not for long, something heavy landed on her back… followed by another heavy thing.

"Oww… heeey get off meee…"

When she got to her senses and stood up. She saw the faces of men that she printed.

"OMGZ." She said.

"OMG… Kuran… were back…" Zero couldn't believe that they were back. Kuran was amazed too. The two guys held each other's hands and giggled and jumped for joy.

"Heehee… OMG were totally baaaackk!!"

Yuki was jawdropped. What happened exactly to these guys?

The answer?

Well… See you next night.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

**There! Kinda feeling drowsy now so I'll give you the interview portion !! Dandandandaaandadnandandandandadadadadadaaaaan!! Daaaaaaaan … puffpuffpuff… okay.. here I present Yuki, Kain, and Aidou!! **

**CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP**

**FROM X-TWILIGHT-X**

_**Hey x  
Whoa, a Barney bomb?! Awesome! ...well, aslong as the bishounens don't go bang! Yay for the yaoi! The blood was gross though. Bloods very hard to get out y'know Kaname.**_

Heh, the 'magic' didn't help your eyes XD That bit had me in stitches! I think I broke my lung laughing...ow...damn Kaname...

...Yuki's age exceeds her braincells apparently...Your welcome?

Sorry for typing the words . How about OG Sly?! You'll call me? You have my number? Damn, I need to stop giving my number out to randomers on the street, huh?

Looking forward to the next one.

Ariana&Christine x__

Yuki: OMG, you broke something? Awww poor girl… you should see a psychiatrist! 8D… Really?! O.o am I getting that old already? Ohmygosh D8 I didn't know… wait… how old am I already?? OMG… what date is it today?! Date? Hour?! OMGOSH!!

Kain: Oh boy. She's experiencing braincell damage again… can someone please get a stretcher? Thank you.

_Minutes later…_

**FROM SCARLET-AND-SNOW**

_**Plan A has failed. So terribly sorry Kaname, but if that Barney explodes, your face will be deformed and all of your fans will turn to Kain instead. Then Aido will have to cry endlessly until he transforms into Ukitake of Bleach, or probably Urahara... XD**_

Kain! Don't forget to hate Ruka and love me instead! But I'm really thinking of switching to Shiki instead. Pity. The poor bloke's probably dyed his hair blond, and Rima, red. Maybe switched identities. Then there goes Ichijo. I wonder what he'll say if Kaname gets deformed...hm...

Aidou: Ukitake or Urahara hm?? I'd rather choose Urahara because I dun wanna have tuberculosis. Man that thing sucks and can take your life away! It's pretty scary you know! D8

Kain: Hmmm… maybe I can do that… say… want me to fix you up on a date with the vice or Shiki here?

Rima: AHEM!!

Kain: uh… lemme rephrase that…

**FROM NEUVIEMECIEL**

_**BARNEY !  
Loving Purple Monster !**_

This lovely Barney is a bomb ?! DAMN YOU KANAME-SAMA ! Exploded/burned people aren't sexy AT ALL ! AT AL ! They could be naked, it's not sexy ! They could be WHATEVER : NOT SEXY ! Plus ! This is ruining a WONDERFULL Barney-purple-loving-dancing-singing-dinosaur !

Kain : You could hit her, like maybe 20 times will do hit, with a frying pan. This Frying pan have to be pink with green flower. After, you put her for five to seven hours in ice, than you make melt the ice with a every hot fire. Than it's cook ! It's delicious with ice cream and strawberry !

Aidou : Thanks for offering me ! But, I'm not sure if I'm a vampire now that I think about it. My eyes never got red. And it could be dangerous for Kain to be my roommate, I'm sure he'd lost himself in... Well, all the bra and stuff on the ground and everywhere. (And not love the bunny drawing that I'll surely put on the wall xD)

And wait ! The bomb will made explode the jail ! They're vampire so they'll heal and be sexy again... GOOD KANAME-SAMA ! Being evil's serving you !

Kain: O.o really? Maybe I should give it a try 8D. I'll share it with you sometime! But It'd be a hard time to find a frying pan that's pink with a green flower. I'll list that up on my shopping list. –winkwink-

Aidou: D8 aww why not? Awww… The eyes? Hahha… Those are just computer effects to make the movie more interesting! Hahaha!! As for Kain to be your room mate… DON'T WORRY! I could always kick him out of the dorm room for ya! 8D OH! OH! You draw bunnies?! Awesooome!!

**Anyway, that'll be all guys! See you next night! **


	22. Gay Gas

**Author's Notes:**

**Hmmm kinda quick update I guess? You be the judge. The data was going through my mind over and over so I guess I just needed to type it in words. I'm very sorry for the last chapter. There were so many typos. One part is that when Aidou was running down the stairs to show his assignment, he actually tripped, not stripped… and the hole on the cell thingy. I think I typed one with a 'w'. So there… I needed to clear those things out. Anyway, here I present …..**

**Night 21: The Gay Gas**

Yuki had her jaw dropped upon seeing the two guys held each others hand and giggled for joy. WTF. Whatever happened to these two?

"Zero! Kaname-sempai! I'm so glad you're both here and safe!" she said, hugging the two men together.

"EEEEKkk… don't touch me." Kaname said as he shoved off some of Yuki's passed dirt to his blazer.

"O.o" was the expression of Yuki's face.

"Yeah… don't even go near us. Hahhaa… we don't go for girls." Zero said as he giggled some more with Kaname.

"WTH. The chairman must know about what happened to these people."

**2222222222222222**

"Akatsukeeee! I give uuupp.. what's the answeeeeeeeer?" Aidou pleaded to his cousin. It was already 5 am. 8 hours of actually studying and analyzing the same problem. Kain was actually out of his mind already. It was his mistake to make his cousin find the answer out. Everytime he falls asleep, his cousin eventually pokes him to death and wakes him up and ask him, "IS THIS THE RIGHT ANSWER?!"

"OKAY! I give up. Sheesh. Hanabusa. You weren't even going to let me have my sleep. It's so simple. The surgeon was his MOTHER."

A Pause.

"WHuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuttttttttttttttttt?! That's eeet?! I can't believe how stupid I was!" Hanabusa actually slapped himself on the forehead. "Sheesh. That was tough… I can't believe it!! I'm so styoooooopeeeeeeed." Kain actually heard his cousin underestimate himself, and hitting his forehead again and again.

"Now, let's go to sleep?" Kain asked as he began to stand from the chair he was actually sitting on. His butt kinda hurt already.

"WAIT! That was only number one. We have to answer 49 others!"

"WTF?!"

**2222222222222222**

"So that's what happened?" Chairman asked again, confirming Yuki's report.

"Yes… they were suddenly giggling and holding each other's hand. It's a disgrace! I was supposed to attract both of them and make a love triangle out of it!! Man…" Yuki said to herself.

"I had Yagari inspect the barney stuffed toy that was in Zero's room. Actually all of it contained substances to make a nuclear bomb… and some gay potions.."

"GAY POTIONS?!

"SO I've heard. It was Kaname's doing all along. I've read it in his diary." Chairman said as he fixed his glasses.

"You mean you read their diaries?!"

"Well, yea. I taught him to write all his thoughts in his diary since he was a child. You too, and Zero. IN that way, I can easily find out if something's wrong with you, my dear children." He answered. Yuki gave a thought about it. He was right after all.

Suddenly, the door banged open.

"Yagari?" Chairman was startled and he stood up his chair.

"Kaien… bad news… Ichiru is.."

Kaien's eyes widened and went immediately to the room where Ichiru was inspecting the other stuffed animals in Zero's room. Couldn't help her curiosity, Yuki followed.

"OH MY HEAVENLY BODY!!" Kaien freaked out as he opened the door of Zero's room. There was Ichiru, standing barefooted on Zero's bed, with emo headphones on his ears singing…

"YOOO!! AI WANNA TEK YOOO TOOO DA GAYY BAAHHH! AI WAANNA TEK YOO TOOO DA GEYBAAH! AI WANNA TEK YOO TO DAAA GEYBAH GAYBAH GEHBAHHHH WOOOOOOOOO!! Hahahaha!!"

Ichiru was enjoying himself fully, as he swung his hips to any direction he wanted.

"OMHB, is this the effect of the gay potion?" Kaien asked Toga who was staring at his disciple on the bed.

"It seems to be. I find it sexy." Yagari replied.

"WHAAT?! Are you crazy?!"

Not too long, a flying turtleneck shirt hit Yagari's face. Ichiru was actually starting to strip his clothes off.

"PG 18!!" Kaien said as he quickly covered Yuki's eyes.

"Hey! I wanna see!!" Yuki tried to take the chairman's hand of her eyes but no prevail.

"Yagari, you need to solve this problem before it gets out to the other dorms." Kaien said as he stared seriously at the vampire hunter.

"Gotcha."

**2222222222222222**

Rima was actually planning to change her hair back to the old style. Curly locks actually doesn't fit her. She was headed to the bathroom, planning to wash her hair first before experimenting further on it. As soon as she opened the door, she freaked out.

"OMGAAAAA!!"

She was totally startled to see Kain lying on the floor.

"Akatsuki?! Are you alright?!" She asked as she checked her comrade for a pulse. He was still alive luckily.

"Akatsuki, do you hear me?! Answer me if you hear me!!"

"Musstaaayaawaaayyyfroooommm… geeekcuzzzz…" he mumbled.

"…What? " Rima asked , once again.

"Neeeeeeeeeedddddsssssssllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppp……. Cuz planssssssss too keeeeel… miiii."

Rima didn't understand. Then something popped in her mind.

"Stay there. I'm going to get help from your cousin."

"NO!! Don't please… I'll do anything .. just don't make me face that freak D8."

"Oh… I'm sorry…"

"RIMA DEAR?!"

Rima was startled. She knows that voice. But she didn't quite believe her ears.

"Rima dear?? Yoo hooo…"

Rima immediately ran out of the bathroom.

"Goodness gracious, Senri Shiki?! " Rima couldn't believe her eyes when she saw the brown haired guy wearing her night class uniform with wearing a terribly pinkish blush on, on his cheek, and very dark eyeliners.

"Hey darling. I was wondering where you kept your lipstick. I was gonna borrow it for a while. See here. My lips are chapping." Shiki said as he points to his terribly dry lips.

"Shiki! Don't worry. You can borrow mine." Ichijo entered the scene, offering his hot pink lipstick to Shiki.

"Gee, thanks! Heehee…"

With both THUDS, Kain and Rima both fell on the bathroom floor.

"**This isn't happening…"**

_TO BE CONTINUED…_


	23. Another Conference

**Night 23: Another Conference**

_Wild has joined the conference_

_Ilooklikemisa has joined the conference_

_Iluviamhot has joined the conference_

Wild: now that were all here…

Iluviamhot: QUESTION!! Why are we here?

Ilooklikemisa: Idiot! Were here to discuss about the things that are going out of control here in the academy!

Iluviamhot: omg seriously?

Wild: there you go again RUKA!!

Iluviamhot: whaaaat?! You can't blame me! I love saying those words.

Ilooklikemisa: it's actually sort of annoying.

Iluviamhot: nooo way…. D8

Wild: anyway, as you can see, everyone is turning gay here in the academy, and I don't even know what the heck is making all these people gay.

Ilooklikemisa: -sob!- I want my Shiki back…. Huhuhu :(

Iluviamhot: don't we all want our boys back?!

Wild: ….

Iluviamhot: by the way, I heard Zero's twin brother died.

Ilooklikemisa: who?

Wild: the crazy guy who went with Shizuka because he was hoping he could get some vampire meat?

Iluviamhot: EXACTLY

Wild: oh. How did he die then?

Iluviamhot: I've heard that the chairman and that Toga guy decided to bring him to Disneyland. Says they're going to make some observations on what they can do to make the effect of the gay gas null.

Wild: let me guess…

Ilooklikemisa: OMG, Mickey Mouse killed him?!

Wild: ….

Iluviamhot: ….

Wild: now do you want to get Senri back or what?!

Ilooklikemisa: I DO I DO!!

Wild: good! Then we'll have to work together for a brighter future for everyone! And everyone's future offsprings.

Iluviamhot: …….

Ilooklikemisa: …. Do we have to talk about offsprings, seriously?

Wild: not really. But it's included in our future.

Iluviamhot: well, as long as its Kaname-sama… I'm willing to do everything.

Ilooklikemisa: you're a sl-t, Ruka.

Iluviamhot: and you're a b-tch.

Wild: can we stop these horse languages people? Children might read these conversation of ours.

Iluviamhot: okay! Fine fine, now to get serious. Any suggestions??

Wild: I'm afraid… none.

Iluviamhot: good. Meeting adjourned.

Wild: Wait…. Ruka, don't you realize that something's completely different in the atmosphere in the moon dorm?

Iluviamhot: … no… what?

Wild: Kaname's gone.

Ilooklikemisa: o.o now that you mentioned it…

Iluviamhot: O.o by gosh you're right!

Wild: I can't believe you weren't able to notice that.

Iluviamhot: T.T let me die.

Ilooklikemisa: gladly :D

Wild: idiot. Don't be such a baby. They just sent Kaname and Zero to Disneyland for observatory reasons.

Ilooklikemisa: why Disneyland?

Wild: ….

Iluviamhot: …

Wild: you're right. Why Disneyland?

Iluviamhot: maybe because it's full of stuff gay guys would like..

Wild: like carousels and stuff.

Ilooklikemisa: yeah… they must be enjoying right now. Riding happily on those fake wooden horses.

Iluviamhot: NO! Kaname-sama's totally allergic to low class paints and wood. His allergy might attack, and he didn't even bring his medicine! Huhuhuhu…

Wild: stop crying. We won't be able to do anything if you just cry about it. Anyway, have you two done something about your hairstyles?

Ilooklikemisa: I did!

Iluviamhot: not yet.

Wild: don't tell me you'll look like twins.

Iluviamhot: maybe. :D I've always dreamt of having a twin! XD

Ilooklikemisa: No!! I don't want a twin. Change your hairstyle Souen later, immediately, right now!!

Wild: ??

Iluviamhot: ?? Rima, wrong gramming .

Ilooklikemisa: hahahhaa wrong gramming hahaha!! Who's wrong in grammar now?

Wild: this isn't really going anywhere.

Iluviamhot: yes it is.

Ilooklikemisa: no it isn't.

Wild: gah. Fine. I'm going to do something about it myself.

Ilooklikemisa: you won't be needing our help anymore?

Wild: yes.

Iluviamhot: ya sure?

Wild: uhuh.

Ilooklikemisa: you promise?

Wild: yeah.

Iluviamhot: omg… seriously?

Wild: …….

_Wild has left the conference_

Ilooklikemisa: now look what you did.

Iluviamhot: did what?

Ilooklikemisa: you're mean, Ruka. You didn't even know that Kain was head over heels for you.

Iluviamhot: hahaha… your jokes aren't funny.

Ilooklikemisa: who says I'm joking?

Iluviamhot: I DID! HAHAHA?!

Ilooklikemisa: no I'm not. Can't you see he's enduring all this pain because you only see Kaname and not him?

Iluviamhot: errrr… username says it all??

Ilooklikemisa: whateeveerr…

Iluviamhot: and who says Senri was head over heels for you?

Ilooklikemisa: …

_Ilooklikemisa has left the conference_

Iluviamhot: awww I hurt her feelings.

Iluviamhot: waah… I want my mommy… MOMMYYY!!

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	24. Yuki's Diary Part 2

**Night 24: Yuki's Diary part 2**

Dear Diary,

Each day is getting worse. I mean, yes we found Kaname and Zero again… but this time something's wrong with those two gays! … I mean… guys. Chairman said that something infected their brain cells… but what? Is this only happening with Zero and Kaname? I don't really know. It sucks… Ichiru was affected by it too. Later, Chairman decided that they take Zero, Ichiru and Kaname to Disneyland. Then it was at 4:00 pm.. an accident happened… Ichiru was killed on a Roller Coaster accident… reason? He was so excited about riding one and got too overconfident. He didn't even dare to take his seatbelt. All that was left of him was that freaky mask of his. Poor guy. I think his funeral will be held tomorrow. Anyway, enough about Ichiru. What I'm concerned about is Zero and Kaname. Are they going to return to the sizzling hot bishies the way they were before? Head over heels for me? I don't really know. I'm kinda worried. I'm even wearing the wrong pair of socks. I wonder why? I made sure that I got the black pairs… I only bought one pair since first year because of my poverty. D8 it sucks. Its full of holes now. And… OHMYGOSH! LILY!! Since Zero's in Disneyland right now, who takes care of Lily?! Oh gosh, I have to run to the stable now! Gotta go!!

YUKI ;)


	25. Rehabilitation for Guys

**Night 25: Rehabilitation Center for Gays**

Ah, Disneyland. The place where every kid dreams to be. Balloons, fun and games… rides for excitement… but not for these two lads… they were both forever stuck in the infirmary for about three weeks now.

The doctor was holding a set of pictures and shows it infront of the amazed Kaname who was sitting on a hamburger chair, while Zero was watching the set of Barney shows while waiting for his turn.

"Now, Kaname. I want you to tell me what this is." The doctor said as he held a picture of dumbbells infront of Kaname.

Kaname stared blankly at the picture for a moment then began thinking.

"Uuhhhh… "

"That's right. Keep going. It's good that you're thinking Kaname." The doctor was very proud.

"Conceiler?" Kaname asked. The doctor slapped his forehead.

'No, No, No, you're doing it wrong, Kaname.' He thought to himself. 'Damn them. They don't pay me a lot to do this until they go back to their senses.'

"These are dumbbells, Kaname."

Kaname raised an eyebrow.

"How come they're dumb bells? They're not shaped like bells, and most of all, they're not dumb." Kaname answered. The doctor was brought to cheer.

"Such good reasoning!" the doctor exclaimed.

Kaname's eyes and smile went bigger. Perhaps this is the last test that the stupid psychiatrist wanted him to do.

"That is a very good first step!"

"DARN IT!"

**555555555555555555555**

The doctor showed another set of pictures infront of the emotionally unstable Zero.

"Zero..? Focus alright? Now what is this?" the doctor asked as he showed a picture of a lollipop to the dumbfounded Zero.

"lollipoppps….." he answered, whispering.

"VERY GOOD!" the doctor was very happy because his patient finally showed some improvement unlike the other one.

"Damn Zero. Why is he better than me? Hmp." Kaname said to himself as he crossed his arms.

"how about this?" the doctor asked once again, shifting to another picture card which showed popcorns.

"Popcorn"

"EXCELLENT!! And this?" the doctor asked showing him a picture of Barney. Seeing this, Zero was totally speechless.

"Buh… buh.. "

"Yes? Go on…?"

As he was staring at the picture of the scary purple dino, some scary pictures flashed into his mind. Some Roller Coaster Crashing, bombs exploding, parachutes, bunny ears, popcorns, pink cotton candies.

"My twin… dieeed." He suddenly burst into tears.

"My twin died infront of meee…" he sobbed and sobbed. He covered his eyes but those weird noises still goes out of his nose. Then some snorting sounds occurred, and some liquid was running from his nose.

"Zero?? Poor lad… witnessing your brother's death isn't your fault. You brother didn't die because of you." The doctor said, trying to calm his patient down. As he was watching , Kaname felt his heart being torn into pieces. He couldn't bear to watch someone dear to him cry like this… he was watching a mouse that was caught in the trap because of a piece of cheese.

"It's all my fauuuuuuuuuulttttttttttttttttttttttt…… I'm gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy I deserve eeeeeeeeeeetttttt……. I'm eeeeemooooooooooooooooooo waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!"

"Zero!" the doctor raised his voice.

"Sniff sniff… whaaat?" Zero was calmed a bit.

"This isn't the reason to be acting emo all over. You're Zero! You're the missing piece in Kaname's chessboard." The doctor said, bringing some sense into Zero's brain.

"What? I don't have a chessboard. Stupid freaking psychiatrist. Zero, his tricking ya." Kaname said, crossing his arms while watching Zero get hypnotized by the doctor's finger which was moving right to left.

"You have to find the one that's causing all of this and finish it! You're not gay, Zero. Kaname is!" the doctor said, pointing to the brunette who was sitting in the corner.

"What?!" Kaname was shocked. "I…I'm gay,..? Mommy….? Is this true…?" Kaname began to reflect. Is he really gay? Gay enough to be proud of it?

Then a few seconds later, Zero began to stand.

"That's right… I'm Zero…" Zero said as he looked at his two bright hands.

"That's it… you're getting through!" the doctor's smile was reaching until his ears which were flapping for joy.

"I'm… I'm the missing piece in Kaname's chessboard." He repeated.

"Yes! That's right, Zero! " The doctor was so excited that he jumped on his chair. Kaname's jaw dropped.

"This can't be… what's happening?!" Kaname was so curious that he stood up and went infront to witness Zero emote.

"Ore wa…"

"ORE WA HOMO JANAIIII!!" _TRANSLATION: "I'M NOT GAY!"_

**5555555555555555555555555555555555555**

Kain was walking through the dark halls of the moon dorm, since its already midnight. He fully understands that he is bound to know the secret of what's happening around Cross Academy. Shiki and Ichijo turning gay, and his cousin making him solve logic problems… and other 49 problems to go…

For the meantime, Kain went to the kitchen to get something to drink. There he saw Shiki and Ichijo watching the news while wearing curlers.

"Now for the newsbreak! A while ago in Disneyland, a freak wearing mask was so excited to ride the rollercoaster that he didn't even dare to wear his seatbelt. Here are the witnesses of the catastrophe."

"It was all too sudden, we just saw a man flying saying 'I'm flyyyyyyyyiiiiiiiing!!' out of nowhere then suddenly drops dead on the ground. Poor boy."

"It was his fault. He didn't even wear his seatbelt."

"The conductor should have forced him to."

"Its his fault."

Shiki was so angry that he changed the channel to online shopping.

"Men these days! They couldn't even tell the difference between who's right and wrong!" Shiki said as he applied some hot red nailpolish.

Kain's eyes widened. Its true. Ichiru is dead. He lost grip of the glass of water and ran towards Aidou's room. His cousin' curiosity sometimes gets to use.

"Hanabusa!!"

His eyes widened.

"What the f-ck…"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	26. Kaien's Journal

**Author's Notes:**

**Hey guys! Mishu all! Anyway, school has been stressful nowadays. How about you guys? How's school or work? Its okay to chill every once in a while. It's also a good thing I find time to continue this fanfic of mine which is…. About to end sadly D8 awww!! I'm gonna miss all of you…and, really, really thank you for watching out for this fanfic of mine. I really, really appreciate it you guys. Anyway, I present to you…**

**Night 26: Kaien's Journal**

Dear Journal, 3

Kaien here! Man, all the things that are happening here in the Academy seems to be getting out of hand. First of all, Toga suggested that we should send the three infected people namely Zero, Kaname and Ichiru to the rehabilitation clinic in Disneyland. Toga said that the three should do fine within a week there. If everything's settled, he will send the three back in one piece. But no. Yesterday Ichiru was involved in a roller coaster accident. He didn't even bother to wear his seatbelt. Well, that taught him a lesson.

Anyway, the doctor in the rehab clinic said that Zero is improving, but Kaname… still down the drain. I wonder what kind of disease entered Kaname's brain. He was such a darling boy when he was small… Err… did I just say that? Anyway, I went to the psychiatrist earlier. The doctor asked me if ever I have kid fetish because I adopted too many children before. Then I insisted, No. Then he made me go to the lie detector which he made. I answered no, but the detector said that I'm lying! I can't believe it, I have kid fetish?! Well, atleast not for aprons unlike some guy. Zero said he couldn't find Toga after he was back to his senses. Maybe that vampire hunter enjoyed being in Disneyland too long. Anyway, my entry ends here. I hope everything will be fixed the way it was before.

Kaien! :3


	27. Logic

**Night 27: Logic**

Kain Akatsuki stood frozen when he opened his cousin's door. He saw Aidou, sitting face down on the table, with blood dripping from the desk. After an hour, he went back to his senses and grabbed his cousin's shoulder.

"Hanabusa! What happened?!"

As he turned his cousin towards him, he was heavy. Blood was gushing out of his temples, and splattered into his logic notebook. Kain immediately examined the notebook without letting go of his injured cousin. Aidou… he answered all the 50 items in Logic. Kain was about to burst into tears when someone took hold of his sleeve.

"Hanabusa?!"

"A…Akatsuki…"

Kain immediately shifted all 101 percent of his attention to his cousin.

"What happened?! Tell me…"Kain asked. Hanabusa tried his best to open his eyes.

"Arigato… Akatsuki…" Aidou tried his best to speak up, even if his voice was hoarse, and his breath smelled.

"Eww… Hanabusa, didn't you even brush your teeth before you make this speech?" Kain asked. Aidou was halted. He slowly reached in his pocket to grab a breath spray and used it on his mouth.

"Breath test… breath test… Is it okay now?"

"Hmmm… a little more."

"Okay… how bout that?"

"Perfect. Anyway, what were you saying?"

"There…. Thank you because… because of you… I am now a logical person and –"

"Correction. It's 'vampire'."

"Oh… thanks to you… I am now a logical vampire… and Kaname-sama always loved logical vampires."

"Wait…. I don't get it? What's that got to do with everything?"

"IDIOT! I'm having a brain seizure because of logic! And I'm going to die!! " Aidou exclaimed, which made a nerve in his brain explode.

"Oh… I won't notice until you tell me. Anyway, am I supposed to be crying now?" Kain asked.

"I don't know…"

"Oh. Okay. Go on."

"And… I always wanted to tell you that… I'm glad having you as a cousin.. and…"

"Waaaaaahhhhh!! Hanabusa, don't leaaaveeeeeee…."

"GAAAASSSPPP….. Akatsuki… I know now what's causing all of this to happen in Cross Academy…" Aidou said as he really squeezed his lungs for air.

"Really?!" Kain was shocked. He didn't know that his cousin was that smart.

"It's in my laptop… You can find it in my desktop…."

"COOL!! I'll go and check it out later after you die."

"Okay… and.. gasspp… you can have my logic notebook if you want…"

"Ewww… no thanks mehn… " Kain complained.

"Oh… okay. Anyway, I'm going to die now. Goodbye…" Aidou said as he finally closed his eyes into deep slumber.

"Gasp! Hanabusa, wait, WAIT!!" Kain shook his cousin rather harshly on the shoulders.

"WHAAAT?!" Aidou was awakened. He thought that he was finally going to rest in peace now.

"Can I have your Wii?"

"…."

"Hanabusa…."

_No response_

"O.o Oi… Hanabusa!!"

"HANABUSAAAAAAA!!"

**7777777777777777777777**

It was all too sudden. Zero stared down at the huge amusement park before him as he was staring at the top of a building. This is where he experienced heaven… and this is where he experienced hell. He closed his eyes, he clearly remembers everything about his brother. The voice… the smile… the eyes… everything… as if it was only looking infront of a mirror.

"Ichiru…. I didn't know…"

He paused before continuing his sentence.

"I didn't know that you weren't kidding of what you said…" he said as he opened his eyes.

"I remember it so clearly…"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	28. The Day before Tomorrow

**Night 28: The Day Before Tomorrow**

"Please fasten your seatbelts, thank you. Life vests are under your seats if ever we are to encounter emergency landing." The announcement echoed all throughout the plane.

"Whoaaaa…. They can be annoying at times." Ichiru said as he heard the same tutorial over and over again since this morning. Bored, he looked out the window , with his forehead and chin leaning on the glass.

"Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh Look at the clouds!" Ichiru cheerfully said before turning to his elder brother. I meant, twin.

"Zero? Where exactly are we going?" he asked. As he stared at the person who seemed to be busying himself with face powder, mascaras and eyeliners, it took him an hour before finally receiving a decent answer.

"Disneyland."

"Man, that's so cooool!! Hey, bro, you know the song, 'I can show you the world…. Shining shimmering splendid?'" Ichiru asked as he looked down at the clouds. "I feel like I'm riding Tarzan's magic carpet!" he added.

"What an idiot. It was Cinderella who had magic carpet."

"I thought that was Simba?"

"Nevermind."

As the 24-hour flight occurred, Zero has been annoyed by his twin brother by singing the most classic Disney songs that almost made his eardrums explode.

"Ichiru. Would you please, don't bug me just for one second? Are you planning to destroy my eardrums?" Zero asked as he gave a harsh stare at his twin brother who was unfortunately wearing the sleeping mask and the earphones stuck or glued to both his ears so Zero's shouts and reprimands were totally immune…

"Damn you, no-good-of-a-twin!" Zero shouted as he got one earphone out and shouted at his brother's ear.

"OWWW!! Hey duuude?! What's the matter? I'm preparing myself for Disneyland. Can't you prepare yourself quietly?" Ichiru asked as he tried to feel his brother's hand because he couldn't see because of the sleeping mask. Finally, he grabbed the earphone back and wore it back on his ear.

"Uhh… Ichiru…"

"What?!"

"That's not…"

"What?"

"Excuse me sir, would you like some bread or noodles?" the stewardess lost her line when she saw Ichiru wearing something on his ear.

"Uhm, why is your twin wearing popcorn on his ear?" she asked Zero kind of hesitantly because the dark red lipstick and the thick eyeliner kinda scared her.

"Oh. He was planning to grab his earphone… while he grabbed the wrong one." Zero answered as he battered his eyelashes.

"Anyway, I'll take oatmeal. I'm on diet."

"I see. How about him, sir?"

"He'll take nothing. Just a glass of water will do."

After the stewardess served their meals, Zero turned to the man who was reading newspaper on the other aisle.

"Kaname dear. Can I have some of your cucumbers?" Zero asked, Kaname brought the newspaper down, revealing the lovely cucumber slices on his eyes to prevent eyebags.

"Mehn, how can you read with your cucumbs on?" Zero asked.

"Oh. I didn't have any clue too." He said before removing the said cucumbers from his eyes and handed them to the silverhaired guy.

"There. You can have them." He said.

"EEEEWWW… I don't want cucumbs from your eyes. I might get food poisoned." Zero complained and shoved the cucumber slices away from him. Kaname gasped.

"How could you reject the cucumbers from a pureblood?" he asked.

"I have the right to reject them. Because I'm not adding cucumbers to my oatmeal from the eyes of a pureblood." Zero said.

"What did you say?"

"EXCUSE ME? Can you lower your freaking voices for a second?!" Ichiru asked as he was staring at the back of his seat, facing the puppy, because he still has those dark sleeping mask on his face.

"Thank you very much."

**888888888888888888888888888**

After a few hours, everything was sleeping, except Ichiru who just woke up because he felt his tummy grumble. He hadn't eaten anything for breakfast, lunch, and just a glass of water during dinnertime. Removing the sleeping mask, he turned to his brother who was sleeping with cucumber slices on his eyes.

"Zero? Zero I'm hungry. Where do we get food?" he asked. He was given no response. He just waited for morning, enduring his stomach's complaints about starving.

Poor Ichiru.

Experienced so much horrible starvation inside the plane until they set foot on Disneyland. The mascots didn't fail to amaze them, especially that huge purple dinosaur. Zero and Ichiru put on a big smile and was about to make a run towards Barney but Toga grabbed them back.

"You can have fun first, I'll take you to the rehab clinic later." Toga said before letting them go. Kaname stayed beside Toga.

"Well, Kuran, aren't you going to have fun?" he asked. Kaname just fixed his hair behind his ear.

"Purebloods are never made for amusements like this." He replied. Not a few minutes later, he saw a huuuuge Hello Kitty carrying balloons.

"HELLO KITTY!!" Kaname ran like the wind and hugged the huge kitty who was carrying balloons before him.

_Just as planned…_

While waiting for their turn, Ichiru was busy licking lollipops while Zero enjoyed his strawberry flavored popcorn.

"Where's Kaname?" Ichiru asked.

"Carousel." Zero bluntly answered for he does not want to be disturbed from eating his popcorn. A few minutes later, Kaname was sent to the infirmary because of some allergy. Low class paint and wood isn't made for a pureblood like him, like what Ruka said.

"Hey Ichiru." Toga said as he called forth one of his disciples. Ichiru happily responded and skipped towards Toga to hear what he has to say.

Zero narrowed his eyes. He was getting bad vibes from Toga lately. Watching him talk to his twin with freakish arm gestures and touches kinda freaked him out. After a minute, Ichiru got back to his twin and hugged him.

"Whoah… hey, hey, what's up?" Zero asked as he let go of his twin brother.

"Hmmm… nothing! I just wanna tell you that I really reaaaalllyyy love you as a brother. And all the things that I have said and done like 'omg, freak, I hate you. Die.' And some sorts are only from the script Shizuka made because she promised to give me 25 thousand dollars. Soo… yeah." Ichiru said as he went on licking his lollipop.

"Heh… weirdo." Zero replied and went on eating his popcorn. As he was almost reaching the bottom of the bucket, Zero felt a paper inside it.

"Eeeeww!! A paper!" he said as he began to take the piece of paper out and read it. Its seems to be a fortune teller.

"If you don't want to lose a mirror, always hold it by the hand. If ever the mirror embraces you, do not be the first to let go…. You wouldn't know. It might be the last." He said, reading the paper aloud. He then turned to Ichiru.

"Hey bro? "

Ichiru was gone. Zero immediately looked around him to see if ever Ichiru went to buy another lollipop or ice cream.

"Hey Zero! I'll go ahead first! There's a vacant seat over here!" Ichiru said as he sat down on the front roller coaster seat.

"Hey! Come back you big dummy! You promised that we'll ride it together!" Zero replied. But it was too late. The conductors already closed the gate and everyone prepared for the big loop. The last thing that Ichiru did was to wink at Zero and gave him thumbs up. And then… the horror happened.

"AIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! I'M FLYYYIIIING!! I'M FLY-"

THUMP

"ICHIRUUUUUUUU!!"

**888888888888888888888888888888888**

"Ichiru was innocent…" Zero said as he figured out that the doctor was listening to everything that he said. Damn doctor. Is he a stalker or what?!

"None of this is your fault, Zero. Fate decides itself." The doctor just replied.

"It's your turn to have revenge for what happened to your brother. "

"Go back…"

"and solve the mystery."

A few hours later, Zero rode the plane back towards Cross Academy.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	29. The Arrival

**Night 29: The Arrival**

Kain was busying himself typing on his late cousin's laptop. There it was, Aidou's research about what was causing the academy to be in such a chaotic condition. First of all, he saw a powerpoint presentation that gives tutorials about baking cakes…but that's not the important part! The thing is, he noticed that a secret code was encrypted in the procedures and that told him the code: GAY GAS. Akatsuki's eyes widened.

"Gay… gas?" he repeated to himself. Then minutes later, he heard the sound of the airplane which has just landed on a part of Japan.

**999999999999999**

Yuki stopped writing on her diary and realized that she has just wasted the most important time of her life.

"I just realized that I just wasted the most important time of my life!" she said to herself and threw the pen on one side of her room. She immediately got her diary with her and ran towards Lily's stable.

Arriving at the place, the stable seemed a little crooked. More crookier than before, but its fine. She peeked in, it was kinda dark, and it was so scary.

"Lily? Are you in here? Hello?" she called out. But no one responded. DUH! Yuki, this is a horse you're talking to. As if she'll understand your language.

"Uh… " then it hit her. She realized that she has to speak in horse language in order for Lily to understand her.

"BrooOoooOO!! Huff! Huff!! Munyeeehehheheh?" she called out. Finally, someone replied to her.

"Munyoooh!! Ruff! Ruff!! Munyeeehehheheeh!!" Lily responded. Yuki was so happy. She thought Lily was dead because of starvation but no! Its time for Yuki to play the part of the heroine and abandon all her stupidity to save a life of a horse. The worst thing that happened? Someone locked the stable, leaving Yuki inside for good.

**999999999999999**

At the airport, the securities waited for Zero to go out of the freaking plane and save the day. And there he was… mightily walking down the stairs very slowly from the plane down to the ground with the heroic background music… Wowww… Okay… after three freaking hours, he was still walking down the stairs, until someone pushed him down. Yey, that finally finished it. Anyway, as he was snapped back to reality, some Japanese chicks went to approach him and make him wear flower necklaces that they made, and forcefully sell them to him for 10 dollars each. Of course, Zero made a run for it because he didn't have that much money. Only for the plane ticket and his taxi towards Cross Academy.

Anyway, back to Kain. He realized that the only thing to undo the effect of the gas was to feed them his own self-baked muffins. He shook his head from left to right.

"No way in hell that I'll do that." He said to himself. Then, with loud bangings of the door, he entered.

"I have returned…" Zero said rather seriously.

"Heey dude, where did you go? I heard they sent you to Disneyland." Kain said. Zero was annoyed by that tone of voice.

"They told you where I was send? Actually Kaname was the first one to be sent to the rehab center for his craziness." Zero said and entered the dark room, pushed Kain aside and examined the laptop.

"Hey, that wasn't a nice thing to do." Kain answered as he figured out that his butt just landed on a raw mixture of muffins that Aidou was trying to bake to be the hero of this mess.

"ick… raw mixtures of muffins." He complained and stood up, tried to take the liquid stuff that was attached to his butt.

"So, the only way out of this is to bake a self-made muffin?" Zero asked as he turned his head back to Akatsuki who was busying himself with the icky mixture attached to his behind.

"Yeah. But only the one who isn't affected by the gay gas will have the honor to bake. I am not affected. You are formerly affected by the gas. You cannot bake." Kain said as he began to take his pants off.

"Eww mehn, what the heck are you doing?!" Zero panicked as he began to cover his oh-so-innocent eyes.

"Dude, I'm just trying to change here." Kain said as he got a pair of pants that his late cousin owned and tried to wear it.

"Whuut?! I'm fatter than my cousin? No freaking way."

"Uhm… earth to Kain? This isn't the time for weight comparisons. Its time to save the world dude." Zero said. Kain suddenly snapped back to reality.

"oh yeah… heard that your twin brother died. So sorry about that." Kain said. Zero was halted.

"ICHIRUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……." Zero cried. Kain was shocked. He didn't mean to hurt the poor guy's feelings.

"Uh… there there?" he said, trying to comfort the crying man.

"I didn't even have the chance to tell him that I…. I really loved him as a younger brother!! Waaahhhhhh" he cried and cried and cried. Kain approached the poor man and rested a palm against his shoulder.

"I heard that they're holding a ceremony for Ichiru downstairs. Why don't you go and check It out?"

**999999999999999999999**

"I looove yoooouu… yoouuu looove meee weeere a happpyyy famiilyyyy" the people were singing when Ichiru's tomb was getting buried in cement.

"ICHIRU!!" Zero appeared and pushed all the people aside just to see his brother's casket.

"Ichiru…? Can you hear me…?" he asked. He received no answer.

"Ichiru?" he called out once again.

"I LOVE YOU ICHIRU!! I LOVE YOU I REALLY DOOOO!! You're my little brotherrr!! The one I bully every now and then!! The one I torture… the one I push out of bed when I need the blankettt!! ICHIRUUUUU!! " he cried. But he wasn't answered by his brother. Kaien just stood up and pat Zero at his back.

"Kiryuu-kun… it's no use. Your brother's dead." Kaien said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

**99999999999999999999999999**

Zero's voice was heard from Japan to the rehab center where Kaname was still being held.

"That voice.. Kiryuu-kun's in trouble!" Kaname said as he stood up and stared out the window. The doctor was shocked.

"OMG KANAME! You're back!" the doctor jumped for joy. "Now you can pay me 50 grand for the therapy."

Kaname just stared at him as he heard how much that it was going to cost him. The only way he could think of was grab the doctor's clothing and throw him out of the window, which he did. And they were staying at the 55th floor of the building.

"Sayonara… Sensei…" Kaname's last words before booking a flight back to Cross academy.

**9999999999999999999999999999**

Rima was happily taking the muffins out which she made out of the oven. She was surprised to see one of them already missing from the plate.

"Whutt?! Who ate it?!" she asked as she saw a note on the dining table.

"Touya-san… the muffins were truly delicious… thank you… - Senri Shiki"

Rima couldn't believe what she had just read. Shiki's back to normal! She quickly removed her chef apron and hat and proceeded to the living room. Before she got there, there lay a huge package on the table. IS this the Barbie that she ordered?! Rima quickly ripped the present open to find…

"OMG ITS ZERO'S HOT-ASS TWIN." She cried. This was a dead person! What do you mean they only sent the dead body now? Then who's the one that they're burying?!

"OMFG… SHIKI!!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED..**_


	30. Another Victim

**Night 30: Another Victim**

Opening his eyes, he was shocked to see that the coffin was closed.

"Ohmygosh.. where am I?!" he asked as he tried his best to open the coffin. Is he going to die now? Anyway, Shiki looked in his pockets and pants for a sharp thing to open the wood with. A fail to find one, he sighed.

"Is this the end?" he bit his lip which bled. He was suddenly kicked out from his lame thoughts.

"Well, it's a good thing I'm a vampire." He said to himself as he gnawed himself out of the coffin. Minutes later, he succeeded, then the soil came running in.

"Hey, what the?! Eeww my uniform's all dirty now." He said to himself as he swam over the icky soils. After succeeding, he went out in the open, breathing the clean, fresh air.

"I liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!" he said to himself as he opened his arms widely as the people clapped around him.

"Hey, whoa, wait… you're not Ichiru are you?" one asked.

"No, I'm- OMGOSH! THE SUUUUUUN!!" Shiki then noticed that it was 3:00 pm sharp in his FOSSIL branded watch.

"Is he a vampire?"

"I don't know. He must be burning. The sun's too high."

"AAAAAH!! I'M BURNING!! AGHHHHHHH!!" Shiki exclaimed.

The man looked at the man beside him.

"Uhh… his fangs should be receding?" he added.

"NOOOO MY FANGS ARE RECEDING! THEY'RE GONEEE!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

"Well… I don't know!! O.o" the man added. Then suddenly, a girl with blonde ponytails came running by with the real body of the person who they should be burying.

"People! Listen up! The dead body of Ichiru Kiryu was just shipped today! This is his bo- OMFGBBQ! SHIKI!!" she suddenly burst into tears seeing her beloved man being fried by the sun.

"Shiki!" exclaiming so, she let go of the dead decomposing body in the middle of the area and ran to Shiki who was burning.

"Shiki! We'll die together…" she said as she embraced the vampire who is in pain.

"Touya-san…"

"I never had the chance to say that you're freakin hot btw…" she added as she closed her eyes and cried.

The people just watched the romantic and dramatic scene pass their eyes by.. and suddenly, it rained, leaving a pail of ashes on the ground.

"Here! The firemen are here!"

………

Whaaaaaaaaaaat?!

**000000000000000000000**

Footsteps which were running was heard all throughout the halls of the academy. From the entrance to Kaien's office, the door barged open, and a person who was wrapped around in black bed sheet stood infront of Kaien's desk to see him biting the cover of his pen.

"Uh… chairman?"

"OMG who the hell are you?!" he asked.

"its Kain…"

"Oh… why are you wrapped in bed covers?" he asked.

"the sun's freaking high and I'm not stupid enough not to wear sunglasses and protective stuffs. I might be burnt alive." Kain replied as he approached Kaien to explain things,

"Ookay? What's up?" Kaien asked.

"Chairman… a lot of bad things has been happening since the gay gas was released." Kain began.

"Yes I know exactly what you mean…" Kaien said as he brought his palms together and sighed.

"And I know who is causing all this." Kain continued. Kaien' eyes widened and choked on the pen cover.

"Oh shit… chairman?!" Kain began to panic as the man infront of him began to choke. Eating pen covers are dangerous habits after all. Good thing Kain stopped on that.

"Chairman!" Kain began to shake Kaien's shoulders which only brought the pen cover deeper in his throat.

"Oh shit… I have to do something about-"

"kain…don't…… I… deserve this…"

"What the fuck are you saying?! You're dying!" Kain replied, shaking the Chairman's shoulders again.

"Ooops."

"I…. stole…. Kaname's aprons…. He must really….. choookee…… hate me…. Choke choke gaaasppp"

Kain didn't get it. What's with aprons and the dorm head? Anyway, the chairman is dying and here he is infront of him. He might get suspected.

"No chance of saving you… I'm very sorry chairman…. But I have to discuss this matter with another living dude!" Kain said, finally leaving the chairman to choke on his pen cover in peace. As soon as the doors closed shut, Kaien stopped moving.

"Rest in peace… Rijichou.."

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	31. The Hope of Cross Academy

**Night 31: The Hope of Cross Academy**

Kain couldn't see the logic of what was happening around. Are we talking about logic? No, we're not. Anyway, after not being so guilty about the chairman's death, Kain returned back to the moon dorm. As he entered the living room, both blondes were there, specifically speaking of, Ichijou and Ruka.

"Oh great. You ate Rima's muffins too." Kain said as he saw that Ichijou was back to his old bright self again. Ichijou just said nothing and eyed the floor, while Kain shifted his attention back to Ruka who has her old hair back again.

"Congratulations." Kain said, and Ruka wasn't even feeling happy about it, because three of them died already, it was just announced earlier in the news. Now, it's all up to them, and hell, they can't even find where their dormhead is. He's always the smart guy. He always knows what to do. Like washing the dishes and playing chess pieces alone for hotness effect in his dark library filled with books to make him seem like a smartass. And now he's missing.

"It's all my fault…" Ichijou said as he remembered something.

"Huh? OMG. Don't tell me you're the cause of this gay gas thing." Ruka said as she turned her attention to the vice president.

"Huhh? No I'm not. I'm the reason why Shiki' gone now!" Ichijou said.

_**Flashback…**_

"Shiki dear! Look what I bought from ebay! A nice coffin!! Isn't it gay?" Ichijou asked as he was furnishing the wooden coffin with pink glitters to design it.

"I'm… not quite sure I know how to use that…" Shiki said as he was puzzled just by looking at it.

"You're acting kind of strange today dear, did you eat something?"

"Rima's muffins."

"Oh."

"You should try it too. Then you'll get back to normal, Ichijou-san." Shiki said as he gave the vice president a warm embrace.

"After all of this is over, I promise I'll let you win on Tekken this time… " Shiki said. "Just eat the muffins, and everything will be fine." He added.

Ichijou gave a pout at him.

"All you can think about is that girl's eeewy muffins! I had enough of it! Huhhuh!! Am I not enough for you?!"

"O.o Ichijou…san?"

"Waaaaaaaaaah!!"

_**END OF FLASHBACK…**_

"And soooo?" Kain asked.

"Don't you guys get it? I taught Shiki how to use the coffin! You see in the movie, vampires use coffins for beds." Ichijou said as he smiled.

"…Freak. This is no time to be smiling and blaming yourself for what happened. Shiki and Rima are both dead! PERIOD." Kain answered back.

"Rima?! How did…?" Ruka was shocked because she didn't know that her twin?? Was dead.

"Freak. She followed Shiki and they died together. Stupidity." Kain said as he walked up the stairs. "I know what's causing all of this to happen, and we three are the only hope of Cross Academy."

**ITS TIME TO BRING IT ON GUYS…**

**1111111111111111**

Meanwhile, an evil chuckle can be heard from Kaname's secret quarters, where he keeps all the pictures of cute aprons and Hello Kitties and white haired bishies and such. There was the man who was writing the names of all the people who have died and their cause of deaths written beside their names. What could be more eviler than this?!

"Hahahaha… now for my next victim… '_Yuki Cross'_.."

**1111111111111111**

"Yuki was just sitting by the hay and staring up at the horse who was after all these years been taken care of Zero and suddenly leaves alone in the stable.

"Man.. Zero's such a ditcher for ditching you here in this dirty stable huh?" Yuki asked as the horse just snob her as she was busy eating up the low class hay on the ground.

"I like Zero's hair better…" was inside Lily's mind.

"I wonder where Zero and Kaname are… I wasn't also able to attend Ichiru's funeral…" Yuki sighed and stood up, walking in circles. Little does she know that she's already being locked up in that stable along with that nosy horse.

**1111111111111111**

Meanwhile, the three 'only hopes' of Cross Academy was hacking the computer data system of the academy. Kain was working on the grades, Ichijou was working on the finance section, and Ruka was working on the blogs.

"Eeww… I never knew that Kaname-sama had F in all his subjects…" Kain said to himself, just to make sure not to hurt ANYONE'S feelings about it. All they knew that Kaname was the top student in class and little do they know that they're just being lied to about the authorities because he's a pureblood and a hotass vampire.

Ichijou was also shocked that the tuition fee that they were paying all these years were only going to the year's subscription of Bishounens for Bishounens magazine. OO and last but not the least…

"Guys check this out! The blog of the one that made the gay gas!" Ruca called forth both guys who had been sick of what they just found out about the academy.

"OMG, it is true! The one that made the gay gas!" Ichijou gasped as they began reading the blog.

"_Hehehehe… curlylocks here… I have finally released the gay gas all throughout the cross academy. SWEET! Now everyone is turning gay not unless they eat muffins that are made with pure love. NO one should know about the secret how to undo the curse… they will be ALL turned to gay… and I will be the fairest of them all! HAHAHAHAH!!_"

"Man… that guy is so sick." Kain said to himself. "We should find his whereabouts."

"Wait… there's more." Ruca said and further scrolled down.

"_PS: I'll be hanging out in the living room of the day class and smoke a pipe or two. Byebye for now._"

"Great going, Ruka. That's why I love you." Kain said as he pat Ruka's shoulder.

"Whut?" Ruca asked once again. The data quite didn't get to her mind.

"People, I'll be going to the day class dorms to find if he's really there and have a chat with him." Kain said, walking towards the door.

"No, Kain. It will be dangerous." Ichijou said as he turned to Kain. "Let me go with you."

"Freak guys, don't leave me here! It's creepy here being alone! And its dark!" Ruca protested.

"As long as you're safe I don't give a damn." Kain replied and went on , leaving ichijou behind and locking the room from outside.

As soon as he arrived at the day class dorm, there he saw the evil of all evils, sitting down and smoking a pipe or two. He had those curly locks like his username in his blog. Those boots that were so high that almost reached his knee, and that leather eyepatch.

"I had a feeling that it was you." Kain said crossing his arms to the guy who was sitting on the fluffy sofa infront of him.

"Toga Yagari."

_**TO BE CONTINUED..**_


	32. Who the Hell is It!

**Night 32: Who the hell is it?!**

"What? How did you know it was me and how sure are you?" Toga asked as he smoked his pipe.

"I'm freaking having a nice quiet time here and you dare come infront of me and accuse me of something I.. did?" he added.

"Aha… a confession." Kain said as he approached and tried to pull Toga of the sofa.

"We're going to have you interrogated for further evidences and proof that you released the gay gas." Kain said as he was pulling Toga from the nose.

"Not so faaaast… hey! Did you read my blog?" Toga asked before standing up.

"OBVIOUSLY. We don't even have a clue on who the impostor is. How would we know that it was you after all? The username says it all, _curlylocks_!" Kain said. Toga gave it a thought for a second.

"How come you're so sure that I'm curlylocks? It could be that Kaname guy." Toga answered. Kain was halted.

"Its because…. Kaname doesn't have a blog. And you just confessed. It's a lucky day."

**22222222222222222**

"Now listen, almost all of us died already, so spill the crap out." Ichijou said as he sat infront of Toga to ask him questions. But first, he got Toga tied.

"What color is my underwear?!" Ichijou asked.

"Huh?!" Toga was startled by his question.

"Not answering huh?!"

_**SLAP!!**_

O.O

"What's my favorite color?!"

_**SLAP!!**_

"What brand is my fangpaste?!"

_**SLAP!!**_

"Which is better, Wii or Play station 3?!"

_**SLAP!!**_

"Whoa whoa whoa, hey guys, cut it oout!" Kain said, stopping the fuss about. Toga was slightly delighted by the words of Kain. His face was all red due to hard b-tchslapping.

"You're doing it all wrong. You must ask relevant question about the gay gas! NOT your personal things!" Kain added. Ichijou and Ruka stared at each other.

"Anyway, slapping time's over. Why don't you go and swim in the pool behind you?" Ichijou asked, then untying Toga and kicking him towards the pool.

"Whoah. That was harsh Ichijou." Kain said.

"YEY! I love swimming!" Ruka said and jumped in after.

Kain wasn't able to stop the craziness that was going through that girl's mind.

"Ruka! That's dangerous!! And there's not even a ladder to climb up on." Kain said, scratching his head.

"Who made this pool anyway?" he said before walking out and went to Ichijou.

"Hey, what are you doing?" he asked as he watched Ichijou play the Sims 2 on the pc.

"Playing sims 2! This blonde guy is you. He didn't take a bath since the last three days in the game. Hahaha how funny!" Ichijou was laughing himself out as he was pointing at Kain's supposed to be character. Kain just raised a brow towards the character in the computer. It really didn't look like him and whoa… flies are attacking him… devouring him… AND he's gone.

"Hahahha man that's totally hilarious." Ichijou said as he sold the tomb of Kain for 5 freaking sim money.

"That's sick Ichijou. That game's not realistic anyway. I mean, who dies when the stair of the pool is taken off? Man? Use their common senses. They can climb the pool except when they're too heavy to carry themselves, and who ever in our world died being devoured by flies by just not taking a bath for consecutive days? Think about that man." Kain said as he watched Ichijou roll on the floor laughing himself out.

"I had enough of this craziness." Kain said to himself and went back to Toga and Ruka to say that their swimming time is over time to take a decent bath and time to eat Kain's homemade pancakes.

"Hey guys its time to –WTHMF?!" Kain was totally shocked to see two floating bodies of Toga and Ruka on the pool.

"I…Ichijou?! Can you take a look at this please?!" Kain asked for Ichijou who immediately came over and said, "Yes?"

"OMFK!!" Ichijou was shocked, no, he almost fainted at the sight of the two bodies floating.

"Who killed them?!" Kain asked.

"I dunno. GAAASP!! It must be… the Sims effect?" Ichijou asked.

"Freak, its not true! Don't believe in phony computer game lies!" Kain answered.

"but… but if its true then… OMG! I have to go!" Ichijou said and suddenly ran away.

"Ichijou!! Where are you going?!"

"I haven't been taking baths since last week!!"

"Eeew wtf…" Kain's eyes widened when he saw a pack of flies came flying by towards where Ichijou was headed.

"No freakin' way…"

_**AAAAARGGGGH!! THE FLIEEEESS!! THE FLIEEEESSS AAAAAARRRGGG! AAAAHHH!!**_

"This isn't happening…"

_**TO BE CONTINUED… **_


	33. Kain's Last Mission

**Author's Notes: **

**I know…. Huhuhu!! I've also shed my tears for them… I'm very sorry because this fic is becoming a massacre… anyway… would you like to guess who the culprit is? 8D I will be revealing it next chapter, which is the ending. Awwwwwwwwww :D anyway, please enjoy!**

**Night 33: Kain's Final Mission**

"It's not true…" Kain said to himself as he stood alone in that same area where he was standing when he watched Ichijou die.

"Ruka… Rima… Shiki, Aidou, Ichijou all died… and… they…" he paused.

"And they still haven't paid me their debts."

**BUT WAIT!**

Kain turned back to the dead bodies in the pool.

"If Toga had died then… that means… its over?" he asked himself.

"If its over… then no one will be killed next! That means.. I'm the survivor?" he asked himself again as he brushed his oh so hot blonde hair up.

"But why me? If he can control the deaths… why leave me the last to survive…? Don't tell me he's…. GAY?!" his eyes suddenly widened and began slapping himself out of the immoral thought.

"I couldn't bear to have my reputation as 'Wild' with these gay stuff. The fan girls are counting on me to solve this mystery! ARE YOU, FANGIRLS?!" he asked. But only echoes answered him back.

"Oh well… I still have to find who the culprit is. Even if it's the last thing I do." He said before heading out.

**33333333333333**

"ohmygosh, Lily! We're locked!! " Ah. Yuki finally realized that they were locked from the inside.

"Oh no?! How are we going to live inside here?!" then, she started freaking out. "What will we eat?!" she asked the horse who has plenty of hay to eat from her stocks.

"Ugh... I don't eat hay… but….. but… we have to get out of here someway! Let's see! We need something sharp to get out of this wooden door!" she said to herself and she decided to open the wooden cabinet at the back which was actually a fridge filled with a year's supply of food.

"WTF?! It's a freaking fridge." She said, with her eyes wide. There she saw her favorite food, roasted turkey, YEY! After a while, she started grabbing the plate of meat and began to eat rather… messily. As she was halfway there, she started munching a part of different texture.

"Eeeww… tastes like paper." She said as she took something out of her mouth which is a paper.

"Heeeyy how come there's a paper inside?!" she asked, but she decided to open the wet crumpled paper. Those handwritings…. She knows who wrote this! OMG. After reading the damn paper, she cursed inwardly.

"Oh f-ck."

**3333333333333333333333333333**

Kain wasn't sure what he should do. He kept repeating the same things inside his mind, that he should solve the mystery of the gay gas. But how?! And where is that freak, Kaname? Maybe he has to find him before anything else happens… or anyone else dies. Kain began to go to Kaname's room to at least find something useful about the catastrophe that is happening right now in the academy.

_**KABLAM!!**_

Kain kicked the locked door open.

"WTH, Akatsuki! Don't you know how to knock?!" the brown haired vampire was furious when he turned to Kain.

"O.o Dorm head?" Kain was shocked. All this time, Kaname was inside his quarters?!

"Dorm head… you were in here all the time?" Kain asked, as he watched Kaname brush his hair.

"What's it to you?" Kaname asked.

"What were you doing all along?" Kain asked.

"Brushing my hair!" his answer.

"All this time… Ruka and the others are-"

"Hush!" Kaname interrupted and stood up, approaching Kain.

"You're not alone… Akatsuki." Kaname whispered.

"Munyahahahahaaha!"

OMG there goes the evil Kaname laugh. Kain was certain that Kaname was about to do something to him. But he needed to act quickly. He saw the book that Kaname was reading when he was brushing his hair. First kicking Kaname on his butt and scrammed out of the room with the notebook to somewhere safe, the day class dorms.

It was really quiet, because everyone's dead now. Even the day class students were involved. How cruel. How can this be? Kain stared at the notebook like there was no tomorrow and opened it.

"Shit… so this is the reason why the gay gas was released… they have been working together all along!" Kain said to himself and finally knew what he was going to do. First, he gets a sheet of paper from the notebook and gets a pen from the bookstore and arrives again at the day class dorm, and began writing.

_Dear loyal fangirls,_

_Kain here. I'm happy to spend my last hours with your squealing and love for me. I really thank you all. And the chocolates that you gave me during the valentines day were all delicious, but Aidou managed to steal some from me. Anyway… this will be my final farewell to you all. IN case I'm going to die. But the author of this fanfic told me I'm going to die anyway so I'm writing you all a letter. Don't worry. The author told me that she might make a sequel of this fanfic… and we might see each other again if I'm lucky… or whoever's lucky. This is my final goodbye… Farewell…_

_-Wild ( insert kiss mark here )_

Kain left the piece of paper on the sofa and went to the night class dorms without Kaname hearing his footsteps because he was listening to 'Cinderella Under the Umbrella' on the radio. Kain succeeded in doing so and went to the highest tower of the moon dorm. The stairs were huge, and the space was narrow, good thing he lost a little bit of weight since the killings happened but still he cannot accept that he's fatter than his late cousin. As soon as he reached the highest tower, where Kaname usually plays chess and reads books, he opened the two wooden doors to find the culprit.

"I came to save the day." Kain said. The man who was writing on the black notebook turned to Kain.

"Shit."

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_


	34. How It Ended

**Author's Notes:**

**This is finally it. I really would like to thank you guys for really appreciating my first parody fic . I really really love you all. XD Anyway, I know most of you won't like the ending… just my instincts… but oh well. DX you can complain if you want :D I present to you, the ending.**

**Night 34: That's How It Ended**

"Why are you doing this…" Kain asked. "Kiryuu Zero?"

After hearing the nice impact on how he said his name, Zero made a huge grin and eventually laughed.

"-insert Yagami Raito laugh- I can't believe it… the plan was too perfect and yet still someone managed to find me here." He said as he stood up.

"Why did you do this? Killing everyone in Cross Academy…" Kain asked. Zero suddenly showed him a black book with a 'Death Note' written on the front cover.

"What is that thing? Your diary?" Kain asked. Zero laughed once again.

"-insert Yagami Raito Laugh- no freak. I got this from ebay. This is what I've been saving for all these years! -insert Yagami Raito Laugh once again-" Zero replied.

"You're crazy. That's just a book. "

"NO it ISN'T!" Zero was terribly insulted, but after a while, smirked again, and started scribbling something on the notebook.

"Heheheh… I'll show you how it works."

"You're crazy!" Kain said. "At first I thought you were hot and all but now you're crazy!"

"That's right… AFTER ALL! I wasn't even sane from the very beginning!" Zero replied.

"That was just Soooooo emo." Kain crossed his arms.

"I'm NOT EMO!! DON'T EVER CALL ME EMO!" Zero said as he was going out of control, holding his hot head as he dropped the death note on the floor. Kain decided to take the death note with his jaw wide open.

It was totally in a very slow motion. And after a few seconds, a fly entered Kain's mouth.

"Choke! Choke! COUGH COUGH!!" Kain suddenly started coughing blood out of his mouth.

"hahahah! That's what you get when you're trying to fight me, Akatsuki Kain. DEATH!" Zero laughed and laughed and laughed.

"You're a bitch." Kain said in between his chokes.

"I'll accept your final insult before you die. But before anything else, I want to tell you a tale why I did these things, okay?"

"It was a dark, stormy night. My classmates were voting on who gets to act the Snow White part. To be fair, everyone agreed to draw lots. And I!! I received the pebble part! It hurt my feelings a lot! You know?!" Zero started crying.

"Uhhhh okay? I don't get it. Just because of that you started killing everyone here in Cross Academy? Choke choke wheeze cough" Kain choked.

"I wanted to get my revenge. REVENGE AH SAAY!"

O.o

"Hey, 40 seconds has passed. You should be dead now." Zero said.

"But.. I'm not yet Choke dead? Choke choke wheeeeeze. Maybe I should say a cool dialogue first before choking to death." Kain answered.

"Oh."

Then all of a sudden, the dorm head entered.

"Kaname!" Zero was infuriated.

"It's over, Zero. Put the notebook down." Kaname said.

"I refuse!" Zero said, putting the notebook down.

"Dorm head… I did it…. I found who the culprit is…" Kain whispered with a smile.

"yeah… good job… Kain…"

"Arigatou… dorm head…"

Then he flops dead.

"Now its just between you and me… Zero Kiryuu."

**THE END!! XD**


	35. THE REAL ENDING

**Author's Notes:**

**FOOLED YOUUU!! Yeah, actually that wasn't the ending. But for now, this is gonna be the REAL ENDING I TELL YOU! Anyway… I missed you guys really. Hahaha and I hope you're all doing well. Anyway… here goes. **

**THE REAL ENDING**

"I knew it was you all along, Kiryuu." Kaname said, flipping his curly locks, which made the silver haired guy raise a brow.

"How could you not know?! It was OUR plan, remember? Stupid Kaname." He said, happily skipping towards the brown haired guy and hugging him.

"We're finally together!! And no one will mistake us for homosexuals!!! Yehey!" Zero happily said, rubbing his cheek against the fabric of the man's uniform.

"Silly, we ARE homosexuals." Kaname started the conversation.

"… we are?" Zero asked, looking up at the guy.

"Yes, WE ARE. That's why we planned this rivalry thingy for them to think that we both like Yuki but NO. We love each other, and we're both males, and that will make us homosexuals! And because of that, we had to kill everyone around us because we wouldn't want to be exposed to the whole Cross Academy that we're both gay?" Kaname said. Zero finally remembered everything.

"Oh yeaaaah! That's right! OMG you're so smart Kaname! That's why I love you!" he again hugged the said man.

"Oh boy… I wonder if it's really worth killing everybody." Kaname thought to himself.

Meanwhile…

Some unknown boy was climbing rocks to find a really, old lamp that was almost covered with rust and dirt and… some organisms of some sort.

"I finally found it! THE MAJIIIK LAAAAMPPPAH!!!" he happily said, rubbing the lamp that was covered with algae and … green thingies and barnacles, that wounded his palm. And because of the rust, he suffered from infection and he fell down and died. Poor kid, his role was over.

_I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT! _

_I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT!_

_I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT!_

_YOU LIKE TA… MOVE ITT!!_

"At last! I'm finally awaaaake! Raaar. And I'm beautiful as ever." Some sort of guy who came out of the lamp that sorta looks like Touga Yagari and Kaname mixed together said.

"Vampires!!!! I finally liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!" he called out, and the bats were crazy all over him.

"Oh Hey!! Its BATMAN!" he said as he pointed out to the sky. "Hello Batman!"

"Anyway… Gah. Its time to look for that princess… Cross Academy is still a long way from here and I gotta go on foot?! Maaaaan…!! I just did my feet's nails! Oh well, I guess there's no helping it. I, RIDO!!! Will get rid of all of you!!!!!! WAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!"

THE END


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